Bachmann: Marriage Rulings an Attack on Equal Rights


Michele Bachmann released a statement following the release of the two marriage equality rulings by the Supreme Court, but then she also took part in a press conference where she made the absolutely bizarre claim that the rulings were an attack on equal protection rights.

“This decision is one that is profound because the Supreme Court not only attacked our Constitution today, they not only attacked the equal protection rights of every citizen under our Constitution, they attacked something that they have no jurisdiction over whatsoever, the foundational unit of our society, which is marriage,” Bachmann said.

*headscratch* Even by Bachmann’s usually batty standards, this is inane to the point of being surreal.

She continued, “That is something that God created. That is something that God will define. The Supreme Court, though they may think so, have not risen to the level of God.”

You know how they’re always talking about the fact that the Supreme Court can’t enforce its own decisions? Funny that the same thing seems to be true of God. He never seems to actually do anything when people break his rules. His followers often do, of course, but God himself remains strangely silent.

Comments

  1. John Pieret says

    I guess that the rulings attacked Bachmann’s equal rights to be a bigot attacking the equal rights of others.

  2. Chiroptera says

    …they not only attacked the equal protection rights of every citizen under our Constitution….

    What? Men can marry other men? Help, help, I’m being oppressed!

  3. CaitieCat says

    I’d bet anything that Michelle Bachman hears God just fine. He’s in her head, all the time. “Michelle…it was the Muslims…it was all the Muslims…the atheist gay-marrying abortion-loving Muslims, like that Kenyan Muslin from Kenya whose name is Hussein, amirite? He’s coming to get you, Michelle. He’s coming to get you.”

    And so forth, in that manner.

  4. Anthony K says

    What’s the problem? Just like before, when both gay and straight people were free to marry people of the opposite sex, now gay and straight people are free to marry people of either the opposite or the same sex.

    Everybody wins!

  5. Synfandel says

    Everybody knows that God sounds like tinnitus!

    I’ve been hearing God in my left ear for the last year? I really wish he’s give it a rest.

  6. lclane2 says

    I’m always shocked by those who are comfortable suppressing the rights of minorities. Fortunately it’s not a right enshrined in the constitution.

  7. Zugswang says

    Is there some kind of Evangelical “Opposite Day” observance of which I’m unaware? Because the only other conclusion is that there’s someone in the world who’s really that stolid.

  8. Doug Little says

    That is something that God will define

    How the fuck do they know that when they can’t even define what God is sufficiently.

  9. Loqi says

    @Zugswang
    I’m wondering if there’s a day that *isn’t* opposite day in their worlds.

  10. CaitieCat says

    CaitieCat, lies! Everybody knows that God sounds like tinnitus!

    I beg your pardon?

    Sorry?

    No, really, I couldn’t hear you for the tinnitus. I always thought it was cause I loved my Genuine Sony Walkman Auto-Reverse Personal Cassette Player just a little too well back in the day.

    That’s God? So what, is there, like, Morse code in the frequency modulation, or what? No wonder they have a hard time figuring out what this dude wants them to do. To me it just sounds like…well, noise. AND I WAS A SIGNALLER with the artillery, back in the Army days, so I know from noise, fellow, let me tell YOU.

    Also, I am now shaking my cane and requesting that you remove yourself from this grassy patch which I claim and which is mine and not anyone else’s, all of it, here, that is mine, this, here, lawn-like thing, my lawn, as it were, which is mine. And you must get off it, please.

  11. says

    CaitieCat, I was a SIGNALLER without the artillery. Terribly lonely, really. And it was before radio, so I had a pigeon to take notes back and forth. Awful, awful job. I mean, have you ever tried riding a pigeon?

  12. John Pieret says

    I always thought it was cause I loved my Genuine Sony Walkman Auto-Reverse Personal Cassette Player just a little too well back in the day.

    Big headphones here, not your wimpy earbuds, with Jesus Christ Superstar or Tommy cranked up to max amid billows of a certain sweet smelling smoke.

    God just kept saying “don’t bogart that joint’.

  13. CaitieCat says

    “earbuds”? That’s a strange place to keep your wee- oh, you mean like the iPod thingies. LOL oops.

    No, my Genuine Sony Walkman Auto-Reverse Personal Cassette Player had headphones. And TWO headphone jacks, so when my friend and I went downtown, we could BOTH listen to the Specials or the Beat or Madness (pretty much the only bands we were listening to at that time). :D

  14. raven says

    She continued, “That is something that God created. That is something that God will define. The Supreme Court, though they may think so, have not risen to the level of God.”

    Which god? There are thousands at least.

    Her god hasn’t done much of anything for centuries.

    If god wants to contact me or anyone and define what he meant by OT polygamy and sex slavery, it’s easy these days. Late night TV, press conferences, Youtube channels, blog posts, even op-eds in the newspapers. If god isn’t as competent as any functional adult then….why call it god?

  15. says

    Look, it’s very simply, if bigots aren’t allowed to discriminate against gays, then they aren’t equal under the law. Only by allowing ignorant, superstitious, backwards morons to dictate how the rest of us should live will we all be equal.

  16. anubisprime says

    Surely if her delusion was the kind of delusion all the religiotards boast of, then why does it not just put forth some godly will on the matter and make it so?…why did his spirit not enter and direct the Supremos when they were contemplating the matter?…the Supremos to a gavel pretend great store by their trust in such a delusion, so WTF is going on?

    Is this god an amateur then ? or just not as all powerful as the dumbfucks claim?..seems a little overselling is going on somewhere vis a vis ability!…obviously not fit for purpose!
    Maybe the religiobots can sue the delusion for not supporting their bigotry. after all what is the point of a god if it does not provide the cover to be hateful, harmful, discriminatory, by bestowing the bonus of being able to persecute and be comprehensively ignorant with it?

    There is an outside chance I suppose that if the delusion is not a delusion then it would seem by all measures applicable that this particular deity could not get or give a running fuck in a nunnery what any of its creation get up to!

  17. dingojack says

    I think you’re all overlooking the salient fact here. It’ll probably ruin Michele’s ostensibly hetero marriage once Marcus realises that he can love (and marry) another man…
    :D Dingo

  18. caseloweraz says

    According to Wikipedia, the ratio of divorces to marriages in the U.S. runs 53%.

    “…they attacked something that they have no jurisdiction over whatsoever, the 47%-effective foundational unit of our society, which is marriage,” Bachmann said.

    Fixed that for her.

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