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May 15 2013

Star Parker Welcomes Sanford Back to Congress

Star Parker, scourge of the immoral and self-declared warrior for “family values,” has a column at the Worldnutdaily welcoming Mark Sanford back to Congress because — wait for it — he’s “principled.” Yes, principled. She writes:

Put me down as happy to see former South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford coming back to Washington. He just handily defeated Elizabeth Colbert Busch in a special election for a House seat he himself once held.

I hope he brings his piglets with him.

Once while governor, Sanford showed up at the statehouse in Columbia with two piglets – one named “pork” and one named “barrel” – to protest against the legislature’s quick move to reject his proposed budget that included large spending cuts.

It’s this kind of flair that has characterized Sanford’s political career – both his six years in Congress and eight as governor of South Carolina.

He has always been a consistent, principled and courageous conservative. And he has always done it with showmanship and clarity that gets the points across to voters.

So he’s “principled” because he’s against wasteful government spending. You know, like when he ditched his job as governor, flew to Argentina on the taxpayers’ dime, and lied about where he was so he could cheat on his wife. In Star Parker’s world, that makes him “consistent, principled and courageous.” But wait, let’s look back a year and a half when Parker said, “Sexual responsibility and fiscal responsibility go hand in hand.”

We can’t divorce our sexual promiscuity from our fiscal promiscuity. Restoring personal responsibility in both areas is what we need today to get our nation back on track.

Unless you’re Mark Sanford, apparently. And let’s go back about six months:

As American society has become more self-centered and materialistic, family and marriage have been imploding…

Marriage and family is the pillar of any healthy society. It is the institution through which children are born and raised and through which time-tested truths and values are transmitted from one generation to the next.

Unless…you’re Mark Sanford. Then you’re “consistent, principled and courageous.”

15 comments

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  1. 1
    John Pieret

    Well … she didn’t say she is consistent, principled or courageous.

  2. 2
    doublereed

    Honestly, South Carolina, wtf is wrong with you?

  3. 3
    Larry

    doublereed@#2: In simplest terms, a black man is president. Electing Sanford is SC’s way of fightin’ back. That trumps all the character flaws and outright lies they’ve be subjected to.

  4. 4
    otrame

    I personally could not care less who he fucks as long as it is consensual. Leaving the country without telling anyone while you are a sitting governor? Yeah, that is a problem. Using public funds to do it? Why isn’t he in jail? Why would anyone vote for a man who is capable of doing anything so flagrantly out of control?

    People are endless ridiculous.

  5. 5
    sqlrob

    I personally could not care less who he fucks as long as it is consensual.

    As long as all parties consent, I agree. His wife is implicitly one of the parties.

  6. 6
    Dennis N

    You forgot to mention that the person she was running against was even worse. She was a Democrat!

  7. 7
    Randomfactor

    I hope he brings his piglets with him.

    I’m sure he did. Washington is a long way from Argentina and a guy gets lonely…

  8. 8
    Synfandel

    His wife is implicitly one of the parties.

    Personally, I don’t believe a man should cheat on his wife, but if he does it’s a personal and possibly civil matter between her and him and not the basis on which I would choose to elect or reject a governor or a Congressman. The American electorate needs to get out of its candidates’ bedrooms.

  9. 9
    =8)-DX

    I personally could not care less who he fucks as long as it is consensual.

    As long as all parties consent, I agree. His wife is implicitly one of the parties.

    Except in the hypothetical scenario where he told his wife he was sexually and emotionally unsatisfied and would be looking for that elsewhere. It doesn’t follow that having sex with a different person from one’s monogamous-agreed partner requires the same kind of consent and betrayal of trust is not equatable to rape.

  10. 10
    raven

    Hyprocrisy is one of the three main sacraments of the fundies.

    They are very good at it after a life time of church and lots of practice.

  11. 11
    raven

    AFAICT, Sanford seemed to be a flake and mentally unstable. Possibly a sociopath.

    His affair wasn’t an isolated incident but part of a pattern. He’s been in court since for stalking his ex-wife and so on.

    I certainly wouldn’t trust him in any way and would never let him get behind me.

  12. 12
    D. C. Sessions

    Using public funds to do it? Why isn’t he in jail?

    The Powers That Be decided that the end of his political career was punishment enough, so they never filed charges.

    Strangely enough, this kind of merciful forbearance never seems to apply to poor brown dudes.

  13. 13
    laurentweppe

    Of course Mark Sanford is a principled man:
    Here’s wingnuts’ core principle:

    Public money and sexual freedoms must not be wasted on the proles but be reserved to society’s finest, whose superior virtue is established by their wealth and pedigree

    You can’t deny that Sanford as courageously and consistently adhered to the core tenet of his value system.

  14. 14
    Modusoperandi

    /me draws a circle
    This circle represents The Tribe.
    /me puts picture of Sanford inside the circle
    Any questions?

  15. 15
    waldojeffers

    Of course, yuo’ve got to admire Parker’s principles, too. She used to be on welfare, but of course, she opposes it for anyone else. She’s also had (I think) 2 children born out of wedlock so she knows how hard it is to raise children while on welfare, yet she is opposed to birth control, sex ed and abortion to prevent others from being in the same boat.

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