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Apr 21 2013

Robertson Pushes Illuminati Conspiracy

Pat Robertson spouted idiotic conspiracies about the Illuminati on the 700 Club recently, claiming they were behind the French Revolution. And wouldn’t you know, it involves same-sex marriage? Of course it does. Because letting gay people get married will create a country without God. Or something.

9 comments

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  1. 1
    stever

    Robertson lost me way back when he claimed to have steered a hurricane away from his church. Wasn’t “The 700 Club” originally defined as the set of suckers who had put at least $700 in Pat’s pocket?

  2. 2
    Dan Allosso

    Jedediah Morse, the reactionary 18th century minister who first popularized the Illuminati Conspiracy, also admitted that the rise of freethought, which he called “infidelity,” was partly the fault of ministers like himself, who had overstepped their authority and intruded too much in politics. But apparently he believed right-thinking patriots like himself just had no choice but to save the nation. In 1799 Morse preached a sermon in which he asked “what have the clergy of the United States done to provoke hostility? They have ‘preached politics,’ being opposed to the hostile designs and insidious hearts of the French government and to those atheist goals, demoralizing, and detestable principles which their emissaries are endeavoring to disseminate in our country.”

    Really what they were about was trying to prevent Jefferson’s election to the presidency. They failed.

  3. 3
    SC (Salty Current), OM

    “To destroy the Church”? Pat, it’s the Catholic Church we’re talking about here. Your people were trying to do that, too.

  4. 4
    zippythepinhead

    HA! You ain’t fooling us, Ed! You and Robertson are obviously both working for the Illuminati to make Illuminati conspiracy theories look ridiculous! All to hide the real conspiracy: to spread ridiculous Illuminati conspiracy theories!

  5. 5
    slc1

    Obviously, Robertson is part of the conspiracy of the Masons to offload the blame for the French Revolution and same sex marriage on the Illuminati.

  6. 6
    slc1

    Ole Pat misses the true conspiracy, that of the members of Skull and Bones. Both Bush pere and Bush fils and Secretary of State Kerry were members of that secret society. The most notorious member was the late James Jesus Angleton, formerly the chief of the counterintelligence unit of the CIA and himself quite a conspiracy theorist who spent much of his career hunting for Soviet double agents in the CIA. Never found any.

  7. 7
    Nadai

    Never found any.

    That you know of, slc1. That you know of.

  8. 8
    longstreet63

    Well, Pat, thank God for Napoleon Bonaparte, who ended the Revolution, brought back Monarchy and the Church, and put his righteous boot heel on the neck of Europe for fifteen years.
    This was the only thing that kept gays from marrying by May 1, 1802, err… 11 Floreal XX, I mean.
    Vive L’empreur!

  9. 9
    Crip Dyke, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden

    the French Revolution was aiming to destroy ***capitalism*** – which hadn’t even been implemented yet? Buhwhaaaah???

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