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Dec 17 2012

Couple Hundred Moms End JC Penney Protest

Only a week after announcing yet another boycott of JC Penney over their choice of Ellen DeGeneres as a spokesperson, One Million A Couple Hundred Moms now says they’re “moving on” from that protest. In fact, they say they never intended to say they were launching another boycott in the first place:

Describing DeGeneres as a “strong gay activist” due to her support of same-sex marriage, One Million Moms (OMM) Director Monica Cole told The Christian Post Thursday that the organization issued an alert due to requests for information from its members. The group originally highlighted JC Penney in February when the business revealed DeGeneres as its spokesperson.

“We’re not taking action, we’re moving on. We’ve already contacted the company,” Cole explained, who noted that OMM does not have any objections to the content of the new JC Penney ad, but that it was simply DeGeneres’ appearance that was at issue.

That’s funny. They were getting “requests for information” from its members. Like what, exactly?

“Hey, is that Ellen DeGeneres in that new JC Penney ad? I can’t tell.”

“I just saw that new commercial with Ellen DeGeneres in it. Is she still a God-hating lesbian or has she been saved?”

Help, I don’t know what to do. Should I shop at K-Mart instead? What if I find out the cashier there is gay, is it still okay to shop there or will I get cooties?”

So now they’re “moving on.” Next they’re going to launch a boycott of Disney World because they heard Mickey Mouse was having an illicit affair with Donald Duck.

23 comments

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  1. 1
    docsarvis

    That, and Mickey Mouse’s dog was gay.

  2. 2
    SC (Salty Current), OM

    It’s funny to watch them. She’s gay, and she’s one of the most likable people ever. I fear their heads will explode.

  3. 3
    dingojack

    So, no advertisement with Ellen begging Prue & True from ‘Coupla Uptight Moms’* to boycott JC Penney in order to improve their sales numbers over the holiday season (it’s been a tough year in retail, I hear)?
    Dingo
    ——–
    * Both Prue & True (the entire New York Branch) proudly wear badges emblazoned with the lobby group’s initials in pink 40-point Comic Sans.

  4. 4
    Crudely Wrott

    Moving on, are they? Moving from action to inaction, are they? Making the great leap from faith to apathy, are they?

    How perfectly lovely. How revealing. How apt.

  5. 5
    dukeofomnium

    Then again, it is JC Penney, where nobody shops. If a boycott of Penney’s was successful, how could anyone tell?

  6. 6
    d.c.wilson

    OMM-NOM-NOM never did recover from the bitch slapping they received from comics fans earlier this year.

  7. 7
    dingojack

    dukeofomnium – for a ‘store where nobody shops’ they seem to be making a good deal of money.
    Fortune 500 states that in 2011 JC Penney had:
    Revenue: $17.759 Billion
    Profits: $389 Million (2.2% of revenue, 3% of assets, 7.1% of shareholder equity)
    Perhaps they have hookers in the changing rooms or something! :)
    Dingo

  8. 8
    dukeofomnium

    dingo: Penney is on a lot of corporate death watch lists. Even more than Sears. Sales are down, profits are down, cash flows are down.

  9. 9
    rmsc

    I remember one time when my cash flow slipped under 20 billion and my family was forced to shop at JC Penney.

  10. 10
    anandine

    they heard Mickey Mouse was having an illicit affair with Donald Duck.

    No, the rumor was that Mickey was fucking Goofy, but in fact, they just meant to say he was crazy.

  11. 11
    anandine

    Dingo @7, it may have something to do with the fact that the value of outstanding stock is about 2.5 times the value of its assets. They don’t have that much good will.

  12. 12
    frog

    I find it hard to believe that a budget store would be failing during an economic slump. Or is JC Penny considered better than that? They’re above Wal-Mart, Sears, and Kohls. But they’re well below Macy’s. They’ve pretty much got that whole “slightly above the low-class stores” space to themselves. If they’re failing, it’s because of mismanagement and failure to position themselves correctly in the market.

    As for the Couple Hundred Moms and Disney, I’m sure they’re going to protest Donald Duck’s lack of pants and that he lives with his three nephews.

  13. 13
    savagemutt

    That, and Mickey Mouse’s dog was gay.

    If that’s a Soap reference I award you 100 internets.

  14. 14
    Gregory in Seattle

    They called for a boycott. They were ignored. Now they are saying that there is no boycott, there never was a boycott, they were moving on, nothing to see, we have always been at war with Eurasia.

  15. 15
    John Hinkle

    “We’re not taking action, we’re moving on. We’ve already contacted the company,” Cole explained…

    Moms: Hello, JC Penny? We’re moving on. You can stand down your defenses.I think we’ve caused you enough damage for now. Just be glad we didn’t dial it up to 10.

    JC Penny: Who is this?

  16. 16
    democommie

    Threadjack, my bad:

    I need to say this, in case anybody knows how to get it out there.

    My entry for the Anti-NRA message that should be on every thinking person’s brain, t-shirt, bumpersticker and billboard.

    “If you have to carry a gun, the terrorists have already won.”

    Also, why don’t the Pro-regulation (not “anti-GUNZ”) folks take a page from the Anti-choice playbook (no, not shooting people we disagree with!) and show up at the next congressional hearings on “Gun Control” with great big glossy signs with photos of dead PEOPLE on them to let the congresscritters know that we know that they know what’s really goin’ on and we’re sick and fuckin’ tired of them pretending that they dont.

    I FUCKING HATE J.C.Penney. I’m going shopping there (there’s one a mile from my house) when I get back from my eye exam.

  17. 17
    Larry

    I think the only thing we can do is politely point and laugh at them for being the clowns that they are.

    Morans all.

  18. 18
    hexidecima

    ah, the usual words of a Christian gruop when they’ve failed and they don’t want to admit that their god either doesn’t exist or didn’t support them.

  19. 19
    Forbidden Snowflake

    In 2012, American homophobes have gone after Ellen Degeneres and Oreos. Conceptually, that is really very close to hating moms and apple pie.

  20. 20
    Kevin

    I’ve always wondered why people think a million supporters of anything is such a big whoop.

    That’s 0.3% of the US population. If a million people boycotted something and the rest of the population decided to deliberately seek out that something, that thing would be the most popular thing ever.

  21. 21
    Marcus Ranum

    They’re backing away from it because they know that when Penny goes bankrupt, they’re going to get blamed.

  22. 22
    Ichthyic

    I remember one time when my cash flow slipped under 20 billion and my family was forced to shop at JC Penney

    can I be your accountant?

  23. 23
    Ichthyic

    If a million people boycotted something and the rest of the population decided to deliberately seek out that something, that thing would be the most popular thing ever.

    IIRC, wasn’t there a spike in sales after their last big media noted “boycott”?

  1. 24
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