Quantcast

«

»

Oct 29 2012

1.4 Million Voting for Jesus

I’ve written before about Bill Keller, who bills himself as the world’s top internet evangelist, campaigning to get people to write in the name of Jesus on the presidential ballot instead of voting for Obama or Romney. Last I checked in, about 250,000 people had pledged to do so. Now his website claims that almost 1.5 million people have joined the crusade. That’s more than 1% of all the people who will vote on Nov. 6.

29 comments

Skip to comment form

  1. 1
    a miasma of incandescent plasma

    Yay! 3-party system!

  2. 2
    reddiaperbaby1942

    this actually isn’t a bad idea, and should be encouraged. I’m pretty sure anyone who does this would otherwise vote for Romney, and this will help split the Republican vote. It will counteract the Democratic votes given to Jill Stein — a scenario which terrifies me.
    We should work to support Green candidates at the local and state level, and in Congress; but splitting the Democratic vote in this Presidential election is just too dangerous.

  3. 3
    machintelligence

    I am tempted to go and sign up (even though it means lying) just to strike fear into the hearts at Romney campaign headquarters.

  4. 4
    fifthdentist

    Republican officials would just consider a vote for Jesus as someone casting a ballot for Romney’s illegal gardener and insist that it be counted for his boss.

  5. 5
    Curt Cameron

    No matter which candidate these 1.5 million would vote for, our election results can only be enhanced by taking 1.5 million irrational people out of the election process.

  6. 6
    Argle Bargle

    Is Jesus an American citizen? If not, then he’s not eligible to be President.

  7. 7
    Zinc Avenger (Sarcasm Tags 3.0 Compliant)

    Surely it is only a matter of time before the Republican hierarchy catches on to the inherent advantages of a candidate who is at best dead, and at worst completely fabricated.

    Vote Ghost of Reagan 2016!

  8. 8
    raven

    Don’t worry about jesus’s birth certificate.

    Jesus is god. God can do anything. If he can’t poof a birth certificate into existence, then why bother calling him god?

    I doubt the wingnuts will question it. Who wants to be turned into a frog by an all powerful sky wizard?

    For any fundies reading this, do vote for god. You don’t even have to send him any campaign funds. I’m sure he can just poof those into existence too.

  9. 9
    Doug Little

    Since when has god been interested in democracy anyway. He’s more of a sociopathic monarch.

  10. 10
    jaxkayaker

    In addition to not being an American citizen, Jesus was crucified at 33 years of age. His corporeal body hasn’t been alive long enough to qualify to be president.

  11. 11
    coleslaw

    They may run into a snag:
    8 States do not allow any write-in votes.That includes the one I live in.
    8 States have sore loser laws that prevent someone who ran in the primary from being a write in candidate. (Doesn’t apply in this case.)
    24 States require a write-in candidate to sign and notarize paperwork to be a write-in candidate. Has Jesus done this?
    10 States may allow a write-candidate but the votes will not necessarily be counted or reported.

    I don’t know how much overlap there is among the states in the several categories, but that is as many as 42 states in which Jesus can’t be written in.

  12. 12
    DiscordianStooge

    Not enough votes to get major-party funding, though.

  13. 13
    laurentweppe

    We should work to support Green candidates at the local and state level, and in Congress; but splitting the Democratic vote in this Presidential election is just too dangerous.

    Considering how the first-past-the-post screws your political system, you should just apply the old entrism strategy and fill the democratic party’s lower and middle-level managment with green-minded people (while lobbying for the end of this stupid, harmful and dangerous ballot system of yours)

    ***

    Surely it is only a matter of time before the Republican hierarchy catches on to the inherent advantages of a candidate who is at best dead, and at worst completely fabricated.
    Vote Ghost of Reagan 2016!

    Too much on the left.
    Same thing for Jesus: it’s only a matter of time before he’s kicked out of the GOP for being a communist plant

  14. 14
    Christoph Burschka

    Where’s the birth certificate?

    The issue of fatherhood was never conclusively determined. Virgin birth? Seriously? And these were no doubt the same people asking for long-form and extra-extra-long-form birth certificates for Obama.

  15. 15
    ottod

    It would probably turn out to be like the Bush legacy. The son’s performance would make the father look like he knew what he was doing.

  16. 16
    cottonnero

    I hope all the votes for Jesus are tallied separately, and not included under “Wasted Votes” or “Scattering” or some such. It would be really interesting to see the totals.

  17. 17
    John Hinkle

    @ Christoph Burschka

    The issue of fatherhood was never conclusively determined.

    Jesus had 2 dads and a mommy. I don’t think that falls under “traditional family values.” So yeah, he’s in trouble if he wins.

  18. 18
    D. C. Sessions

    This would be the greatest number of votes for a Hispanic candidate so far.

  19. 19
    Modusoperandi

    I doubt very much He will get anywhere near that many votes. Real American Christian Patriotic Christians® might love themselves some Jesus, but they hate Obama more.

  20. 20
    Chiroptera

    Actually, there were a couple of time where, after I looked at the lousy choice of candidates running, I was tempted to write “Jesus Christ!” on the ballot.

  21. 21
    conway

    Marriage is between one man, one woman and one dove.

  22. 22
    pa747sp

    Is that 1% part of the 47% the Romney can’t be bothered to represent?

  23. 23
    Scott Simmons

    Wow. I was just joking on my comment from two posts back.

    I’d mention Poe’s law, but I don’t want to get thrown off Ed’s blog. ;)

  24. 24
    Doug Little

    Scott Simmons,

    Must have been a crappy attempt because it ain’t there now.

  25. 25
    dingojack

    It gets worse for Jesus -
    Was either Mary or Joseph an American citizen? Did either of them reside in America for 4 (or is it 2) years before their 19th birthday?*
    Does the (much beloved) constitution grandfather back 1800 years or so before it’s own existence? And so on.

    Now Mickey Mouse on the other hand…

    ;) Dingo
    ——
    * Can they bring forth documentary proof or witnesses to that effect?

  26. 26
    dingojack

    Doug Little – Oh yes it is. See here.
    Helpfully, Dingo

  27. 27
    grumpyoldfart

    So 1.5 million complete dickheads in America. I thought there’d be more – especially since it’s an evangelist spouting the bullshit.

  28. 28
    democommie

    So, okay, you vote for JESUS for PotUS. Who’s his VP? What’s the rest of the “down ticket” look like? Hey, wadeaminnit, “down ticket”? That could include old Scratch, hisself. Hey, it’s a “Split (hoof) ticket”! It’s a Satanic PLOT!!

    “For any fundies reading this, do vote for god. You don’t even have to send him any campaign funds. I’m sure he can just poof those into existence too.”

    I would have to say that you’re wrong on this. Look at the number of convangelicals out there, collecting money for JESUS, ‘cuz he doesn’t have the organizational or fundraising skills.

  29. 29
    cafeeineaddicted

    Okay, I’m reminded of that Eddie Murphy movie where he won a seat by running on name recognition, by sharing the name of a deceased congressman/senator.

    Who wants to rename themselves and run as Jesus Christ for 2016?

Leave a Reply

Switch to our mobile site