Disgraced evangelist (read: con man) Jim Bakker still has a show on television, on which he sells vitamins and nonsense to credulous followers. He had fellow lunatic Cindy Jacobs, who claims to be able to raise the dead, on his show and he talked about God speaking to him “in alliterations” like “desert disaster.” And he bravely gives prophecies of earthquakes along fault lines and hurricanes and floods in New Orleans.
Nostradamus, call your office.
16 comments
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cswella
September 15, 2012 at 9:34 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Earthquakes on fault lines? They’ll never happen.
John Pieret
September 15, 2012 at 9:43 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
In other shocking examples of Biblical prophecy coming true, the sun will rise in the east and set in the west.
wholething
September 15, 2012 at 9:52 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
I’m sure glad he said I didn’t have to believe him because the cognitive dissonance would have caused a head explosion so large it would have caused earthquakes in California. The “storms like we have never seen before” is what climate scientists have been warning for a couple of decades but he never believed it until he heard it from an alliterative voice in his head.
tbp1
September 15, 2012 at 12:12 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
The fact that Bakker isn’t eking out a living as the graveyard shift guy at a rural gas station, living in the back room and showering at the Y, is one of the things that makes me despair for the country.
D. C. Sessions
September 15, 2012 at 12:23 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
I wonder if he’s up to giving us some guidance on whether the temperatures in North America will be increasing or decreasing over the next four months?
tbp1
September 15, 2012 at 12:35 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
I’m slightly surprised that Bakker even knows what an alliteration is.
Alareth
September 15, 2012 at 3:39 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Jiminy Crickets! He got old looking.
No Jim, the apocalypse only came to your amusement park: http://io9.com/5882369/jim-bakkers-christian-amusement-park-is-now-a-post+apocalyptic-ghost-town
Chiroptera
September 15, 2012 at 3:48 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Alareth, #7: He got old looking.
But in a good way!
Back when he was the big pre-scandal televangelist, I always thought he looked like a creepy evil gnome.
Now he looks like a lovable huggable plush gnome.
Note: I was watching the video with the sound off. Maybe sound would have made a difference.
iangould
September 15, 2012 at 4:48 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
I’m going to go out on a limb and predict an ongoing series of scandals involving televangelsts, financial iregularities; tax evasion, adultery, prostitution; gay sex and sex with minors.
Ichthyic
September 15, 2012 at 5:32 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Now he looks like a lovable huggable plush gnome.
One can only wonder what Tammy Faye looks like now then…
Ichthyic
September 15, 2012 at 6:05 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
^^
No need to wonder, turns out she’s been ashes since 2007.
I’d point out, in eulogy i suppose, that she actually was not nearly as much of a bigot as Jim pretended to be on TV.
…but that hair…
dan4
September 15, 2012 at 11:27 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
@6: Why are you “slightly surprised” that Bakker “even knows what an alliteration is?”
tbp1
September 16, 2012 at 12:34 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
@12: Because Bakker hasn’t, as far as I know, previously demonstrated interest in poetic/rhetorical devices, what with them being fancy book-learnin’ elitist stuff and all.
And also, while I recognize that he has a certain cunning and the ability to manipulate people, I think that otherwise he is as dumb as a rock and proudly ignorant.
dan4
September 17, 2012 at 12:21 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
@13: The single word “alliteration” is a “poetic/rhetorical device?”
tbp1
September 17, 2012 at 8:44 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
@14: I think you might be making more out of a casual bit of snark than is warranted.
Of course I’m playing into it by explaining myself, but is the Internet for?
But yes, alliteration is a device used in rhetoric and poetry. It’s not a word I recall ever hearing a televangelist use before, and it struck me as slightly incongruous, providing the opportunity for a bit of sarcasm.
tbp1
September 17, 2012 at 9:52 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Sigh. ” …but WHAT is the Internet for?”
Editing capability. I want editing capability.