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Aug 19 2012

Get Your Blood of Jesus Oil

I used to be on the mailing list of Peter Popoff, the faith-healing con man exposed by James Randi in the mid-80s. One of his gimmicks, which he still uses, is to send you a vial of holy water, allegedly from the Jordan river. Here’s a very similar scam — blood of Jesus oil.

This little fraud is brought to you by Woody Martin, pastor of Victory Temple Church in Lenoir City, Tennessee. And here’s the fine print:

This is regular olive oil which represents the Holy Spirit and a special coloring to make it look red thus we call it “The Blood of Jesus Anointing Oil.” There is no virtue or healing in this oil, it is a point-of-contact and an act-of-faith.

Hell, then you could just use some cherry coke to do the same thing, right? Or nothing at all. You don’t need to pour a liquid on yourself to have faith, right? Or you could just stop peddling bullshit to your ignorant followers.

9 comments

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  1. 1
    anandine

    you could just stop peddling bullshit to your ignorant followers.

    But then who would buy it?

  2. 2
    Doug Little

    Yes just keep fleecing the poor and deluded, it’s what Jesus would have wanted.

  3. 3
    Pierce R. Butler

    … Woody Martin, pastor of Victory Temple Church

    Who will clearly inform you that he is not the illegitimate love child of two famous and multi-talented comedians, not matter what they say on the Internets.

    This is regular olive oil …

    The least he could have done was buy Extra Virgin!

  4. 4
    billydee

    A friend of mine gave me a bottle of water he bought on a trip to Israel. It’s supposed to be from the Jordan. It’s supposed to bring me happiness and improve my life. Didn’t work. I haven’t been fucked once since I got it.

  5. 5
    llewelly

    “. It’s supposed to bring me happiness and improve my life. Didn’t work. I haven’t been fucked once since I got it.”

    Oh, but it has kept you pure and free of sin!

  6. 6
    anatman

    i worked long ago with a fellow who doubled as a preacher. we were changing the oil in our ambulance and he got out a little bottle and filled it with some of the dirty crankcase oil. i asked him why, and he told me “this is holy oil from the river jordan. i’m going to sell it tonight for five dollars a drop.” incidentally, that was about two hours worth of my pay at the time.

  7. 7
    cag

    billydee #4, the only one who got screwed was your friend when she/he paid good money for tap water.

  8. 8
    Mr Ed

    billydee #4,

    I recommend voting Republican across the board this fall, you’ll get screwed in more ways than you can imagine.

  9. 9
    billydee

    #5: “Oh, but it has kept you pure and free of sin!”
    But where’s the fun in that?
    cag: He’s rich and stupid.
    Mr Ed: But I want to be screwed the good way, not the Republican way.

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