Here’s one of the more bizarre arguments I’ve ever heard against marriage equality. A British woman who is a consultant with an Anglican organization says that if we let gay people get married, it will lead to teaching kids about the sexual fetish of eating feces.
Writing about her letter to her MP, Dr Lisa Nolland, lay minister and blogger for Anglican Mainstream, has claimed that legalising same-sex marriage will lead to children being taught risky sexual practises in school, including “eating human faeces”.
Dr Nolland writes that “Legalising gay ‘marriage’ will make mandatory the teaching about gay relationships and gay sex. In the powerful name of LGBT rights, graphic materials like those produced by THT (Terrence Higgins Trust) will become much more mainstream for underage teens.”
She adds that this is “a simply massive issue which has been whitewashed, denied, and ignored by this ‘pro-family’ government. We are in fact damaging children and young people because we are allowing special interest groups access to school populations, knowing that on their sites (which kids are assured provide good advice) they are tacitly or overtly encouraged to experiment with high-risk, psychologically and physically dangerous sex acts which can cost them their lives.”
“We teach our children to wash their hands after going to the toilet; THT’s site resource, “The Bottom Line” (p. 16) describes individuals who gain sexual stimulation by eating human faeces as part of their sex “play”. What madness is happening here?”
The link above does note that the leaflet in question actually cautions against doing that, so even if she was right about that material being used in schools — which is highly unlikely — her conclusion is the opposite of reality. How unsurprising.
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tfkreference
June 20, 2012 at 10:37 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Getting schools to teach about condoms is a struggle, and she thinks they’ll teach this? And why do wingnuts see warnings as suggestions?
Modusoperandi
June 20, 2012 at 10:40 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
tfkreference “And why do wingnuts see warnings as suggestions?”
Because descriptive is normative. That’s why home-ec classes are littered with kids who burn their hands on the stove. Oh, won’t someone think of the children?!
w00dview
June 20, 2012 at 10:43 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Ed, how do you keep doing this? If I had to read and listen to the rantings and ravings of wingnuts all day I would be hitting the Jack Daniels pretty hard. It can’t be good for you.
Gregory in Seattle
June 20, 2012 at 10:54 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Self-described standard-bearers of “normal” morality are far, far sicker than any gay person I’ve ever met.
Gregory in Seattle
June 20, 2012 at 10:56 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
@woodview #3 –
Have you ever noticed that Ed posts a lot in the morning, then disappears for the rest of the day?
Ace of Sevens
June 20, 2012 at 11:04 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=euXQbZDwV0w
She’s not the first person to make this argument.
fifthdentist
June 20, 2012 at 11:17 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
And those activist judges mandating interracial marriage led to the making of “The Bodyguard.” … Shudders.
steve oberski
June 20, 2012 at 11:28 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Other than the direction that the faeces are moving, it would appear that the “Doctor” has the same fetish.
dingojack
June 20, 2012 at 11:37 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
And I have it on the highest authority that teaching about marriage equality will lead to leaky gussets!*
Dingo
—–
* possibly even [shudders violently, clutches pearls tightly and calls for industrial-grade smelling salts] public inter-s_x dancing!!!
VeritasKnight
June 20, 2012 at 11:40 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
I actually just did a double-take at the title. Wild.
Abby Normal
June 20, 2012 at 11:57 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
I can see where she’s coming from. It’s just like how legal heterosexual marriage has lead to kids being taught about ass-to-mouth.
Ramel
June 20, 2012 at 12:48 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Ok 10 minutes on google and I still can’t seem to figure out what she’s a doctor of or where she studied, anyone know?
Didaktylos
June 20, 2012 at 12:57 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
There is some rationality to her position – after all, the more they keep telling those pesky teen not to have sex, the more they actually do it …
frog
June 20, 2012 at 1:11 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
There must be some sort of “suggestibility” brain structure in wingnuts (which would nicely explain how they got to be wingnuts in the first place, of course).
Does Nolland (and other such idiots) personally feel an urge to run out and try shit-eating just because she’s heard about it? Is she spending her days now muttering, “No, no, don’t do that, just flush and get out”?
Or do these people think teenagers are just all idiots? Are they basing this perception on their own idiot teen years? I just— I don’t— goddamn, I did my fair share of stupid shit in my teen years, but I also remember declining to do some stupid shit because, remarkably, we are born with brains; they are not magically bestowed on our 20th birthday.
matty1
June 20, 2012 at 1:25 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Is there anything gay people do sexually that isn’t also done by straight people?
Ace of Sevens
June 20, 2012 at 1:27 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
@15 scissoring and frottage.
cypherpunks
June 20, 2012 at 1:30 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
And here I thought it was Martin Luther, founder of protestantism, that fought the devil off with feces and allegedly ate a spoonful of his own feces daily.
An obsession with this stuff is apparently a hallowed protestant tradition.
frog
June 20, 2012 at 3:15 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
@16: depending on how rigidly one defines the range of sexual identification. Lots of hetero people “experiment” at some point in their lives.
(“And that time is college.” Couldn’t resist the South Park reference.)
Funny Diva
June 20, 2012 at 3:43 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
I thought feces-eating was coprophagia, but that’s just me.
The original point, that this Lisa Noland is an idiot, stands. Thank you, British idiot for making the American feel just a tiny bit less ashamed of their national idiocy.
Funny Diva
June 20, 2012 at 3:45 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Ramel @12
probably a Doctor of Divinity.
Great, now I’ll be humming Pirates of Penzance all day.
jayarrrr
June 20, 2012 at 3:46 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
@16- I dunno, STR8 peeps are into frottage. We call it “Dry Humping” and you usually stop it after prom night.
slc1
June 20, 2012 at 7:47 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Dr. Noland is joined in here stupidity by Israeli Knesset member Michaeli, who declares that abortion leads to lesbianism.
http://www.timesofisrael.com/women-who-have-abortions-become-lesbian-claims-female-mk/
iangould
June 20, 2012 at 8:34 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Fog, misses the most obvious explanation.
Many of the wingnut spokespeople probably don’t believe at least half of what they say.
Some probably just say stupid shit because it generates publicity and induces really stupid peopel to give them money.
Others “know” for example, that homosexuality is contrary to God’s will. But there’s whole bunch of filthy, filthy sinners out there who just don’t seem to get that.
So it’s okay to … exagerate … (“Gays just want to adopt so they can rape kids!”) because ultimately they’re doing God’s Will.
stace
June 21, 2012 at 8:26 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Dey eats da poo-poo.
puppygod
June 22, 2012 at 3:41 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Thanks a lot /irony
As I have first slow day at work in about a couple of weeks, I was skimming Dispatches and upon reading the above I exclaimed “Holy shit!”. And only then I realized context and punnines (is that even a word? maybe punfulness?) of this exclamation. So I loled. And then co-worker came and asked what I’m laughing at. It was rather difficult to explain.
dingojack
June 22, 2012 at 3:46 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
puppygd – ‘Some funny shit on the internet’
Dingo