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May 16 2012

Santorum: Romney Should Obsess Over Sex Like Me

Rick Santorum has some advice for Mitt Romney. Unsurprisingly, that advice is that Romney should emulate his failed presidential campaign by obsessing over the sex lives of other people and engage in irrational rants against gay people and contraception.

Rick Santorum is urging Mitt Romney to “step up” and weaponize the issue of same-sex marriage.

“This is a very potent weapon, if you will, for Governor Romney if he’s willing to step up and take advantage of a president who is very much out of touch with the values of America,” Santorum said in an eye-opening live interview with Arkansas TV station KARK, a CNN affiliate…

“Hopefully Governor Romney will continue to stand tall for his position on this issue and understand how detrimental it would be for society for it to have this changed,” Santorum also told the Arkansas station.

Yes, you should do what Santorum did. Because it worked so well for him. In related news, the New England Patriots say the New York Giants would be better off playing like they did in the Super Bowl that they lost.

13 comments

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  1. 1
    The Lorax

    So a Republican pollster took a look at the numbers and sent a memo out to the party urging everyone to re-consider their anti-gay stance, or risk losing an awful lot of votes. And, Santorum is out there, getting his followers excited about a stronger anti-gay stance from Romney.

    … anyone ever see an Etch-a-Sketch in a paint mixer? You’re about to.

  2. 2
    eric

    Maybe Santorum’s advertising for Veep? This could be a not-so-subtle, “pick me! Not only will I be your bulldog on this issue, people will actually believe I (as opposed to you) am sincere about it.”

  3. 3
    pough

    …very much out of touch with the values of America.

    I guess the way to find out what the values of America are is to look at the polls, remove all data that do not reflect the values of America, then recalculate.

    For example, on the issue of gay marriage recent polls indicate 50% for and 48% against. We can safely dismiss the 50% as people out of touch with the values of America. That means 96% of Americans are against gay marriage!

    Listen to Rick Santorum. He is a political genius and he has God on his side. There’s no possible way he can lose.

  4. 4
    Artor

    I hope Rmoney takes Santorum’s advice, and alienates himself from the mainstream public even further. I think that’s the reason Obama finally came out and made a tepid statement in support of same-sex marriage. He didn’t really commit himself to anything, but by doing so, he committed Rmoney to immediately spouting the opposing line, to demonstrate that yes, he’s the conservative Christard candidate. “If Obama says it, I HAVE to say the opposite!!!”

  5. 5
    d cwilson

    The best thing about a Santorum Veep selection would be that he’d virtually guarantee Romney would lose Pennsylvania.

  6. 6
    Christoph Burschka

    Santorum’s right, Mr. Romney. You should do what he says. And while you’re at it, you should pick him as your running mate. The best choice anyone has made since McCain picked Sarah Palin.

  7. 7
    fifthdentist

    Could these people be any more obsessed with gay sex?
    I’ve seen many, many homophobic rants, over several years, on FSTDT that mentioned “felching.” You know what? I don’t know to this day what the hell felching is, other than it’s apparently something done by (some) gay men. You know why? I have no reason to know what it is, and more than that no desire to discuss how disgusting it is at great length on the Internet.
    Because it doesn’t affect me, one way or the other, what consenting adults do.

  8. 8
    cottonnero

    “Out of touch with the values of America”?

    Obama waited until basically the moment he knew that supporting same-sex marriage wouldn’t cost him significant votes anywhere that he wasn’t already losing.

    A calculated political move may be many things, but it is not “out of touch with the values of America”.

    Oh, right. Wingnut. “America” means “anyone to the right of Dick Lugar”.

  9. 9
    Doug Little

    This is a very potent weapon, if you will, for Governor Romney if he’s willing to step up and take advantage of a president who is very much out of touch with the values of America,

    What the fuck is he smoking? He must of been miss quoted or something, maybe a bit of what he said got chopped off. I’m almost positive it should have ended “who is very much out of touch with the values of America back in the 18th century”.

  10. 10
    Doug Little

    … anyone ever see an Etch-a-Sketch in a paint mixer? You’re about to.

    That is some funny shit. I almost choked on what I was eating. The visual of that is causing uncontrollable snickering. Bravo.

  11. 11
    pfgray

    Shhh… maybe he’ll listen.

  12. 12
    dingojack

    pfgray – why would he change lifetime’s worth of habit?
    Dingo

  13. 13
    tommykey

    I wish Santorum could be strapped to a chair for a couple of hours and forced to watch Sacha Baron Cohen’s ‘Bruno’.

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