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May 09 2012

Lou Engle: Fight The Gay Like Confederate Generals

From the department of bad analogies: Unhinged looney tunes Lou Engle of the New Apostolic Reformation told the crowd at Pat Robertson’s “Week of Prayer” that Virginians should fight against the gay agenda just like Robert E. Lee and Stonewall Jackson fought against “Washington” during the Civil War.

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  1. 1
    dingojack

    By circling to the north, getting distracted by shoes and finally ending with a lame-brained charge uphill toward an entrenched enemy who can see eactly what your planning.

    Yes Lou, you do that.

    Dingo

  2. 2
    Gregory in Seattle

    You are quite wrong in describing Lou Engle as “loony tunes”: unlike Engle, the series of Warner Brother cartoons were funny.

  3. 3
    brucecoppola

    What’s this “principalities and powers” trope we keep hearing from fundies?

  4. 4
    Gvlgeologist, FCD

    Refresh my memory. Didn’t the confederacy lose?

  5. 5
    imrryr

    @gvlgeologist – Nah, that’s just what the lamestream media wants you to think. Wake up, sheeple!

  6. 6
    Chiroptera

    Heh. They’re daring the pro-equality side to embark on a scorched earth “March to the Sea”? I can dig that.

  7. 7
    Gvlgeologist, FCD

    On the other hand, at least they’re consistent. Both groups fighting to keep a particular group from having civil rights.

  8. 8
    holytape

    Didn’t those two gentlemen lose? So he’s saying that that anti-gay crusaders should a) be shot by their own troops in a case of mistaken identity or b) make a suicidal charge across an open field? Or is he saying, to General Lee’s credit, when the war appears to be unwinnable, it is time to surrender and accept defeat, instead of taking to the hills and adopting a burnt earth approach?

  9. 9
    holytape

    @ gvlgeologist

    They didn’t lose. They are just waiting. They’ll rise again and invaded the north. The union will never know what hit them.

  10. 10
    jennyxyzzy

    Not only did the Confederacy lose, but there was not a single point in the whole conflict where they could claim that they were winning. They lost territory every single year of the war until it all collapsed in on itself a bit over 4 years after having started.

    Lee himself was constantly frustrated by the fact that although he could win tactical victories, he knew he was getting his butt kicked strategically, and he could not find a single way to change that fact.

    So sure guys, fight against teh Gay like a Confederate General. It’s practically an admission that they know they’re going to lose.

  11. 11
    shouldbeworking

    Will the TSA be screening people on the new underground railroad?

  12. 12
    dingojack

    Mebbe after Lou’s little effort on Washington, the ‘Gay Boudoir’* should skip Virginia and go straight to the ‘March to the Sea’.

    Dingo
    —–
    * a whole lot more happin’ than the lobby!

  13. 13
    DaveL

    …Lou Engle of the New Apostolic Reformation told the crowd at Pat Robertson’s “Week of Prayer” that Virginians should fight against the gay agenda just like Robert E. Lee…

    Translation: anyone wishing to “surrender” to Teh Ghey should meet at the McLean house in Appomatox after nightfall.

  14. 14
    d cwilson

    From the department of bad analogies:

    Comparing your losing battle to keep a certain group of people from having full rights as citizens to a lost battle to deny a certain group of people from having full rights as citizens?

    Sounds like a perfectly apt analogy to me.

  15. 15
    d cwilson

    Translation: anyone wishing to “surrender” to Teh Ghey should meet at the McLean house in Appomatox after nightfall.

    Do they have a public men’s room?

  16. 16
    Hercules Grytpype-Thynne

    What’s this “principalities and powers” trope we keep hearing from fundies?

    From the New Testament epistles (Romans 8:38; Ephesians 3:10, 6:12; Colossians 1:16, 2:15; Titus 3:1. See Christian angelic hierarchy at Wikipedia.

  17. 17
    raven

    should fight against the gay agenda

    The gay agenda is hardly worth getting upset over.

    When the gays take over everyone will have fabulous drapes and owning a pair of stylish shoes will be a human right.

    It won’t destroy civilization.

  18. 18
    dingojack

    Raven – “It won’t destroy civilization”.

    Are you kidding?!? Do you how expensive a pair of cherry-red size 13.5 EE Jimmy Choo’s are?

    Dingo

  19. 19
    slc1

    Re dingojack @ #1

    This is a prime example of Lee’s failure to learn from previous mistakes by himself and others. He did the same thing the previous year, attacking a strong position on Malvern Hill during the 7 days Peninsula campaign where his forces suffered some 5 thousand casualties in an hour, compared to about a thousand for the opponent. Later the previous year, he observed Burnside attacking a strong position on Marye’s Heights near Fredericksburg with high casualties and a defeat.

  20. 20
    dingojack

    SLC – Shit. 5000 in a hour? Why would anyone want to emulate that?

    Dingo

  21. 21
    Reginald Selkirk

    … just like Robert E. Lee and Stonewall Jackson fought against “Washington” during the Civil War.

    By committing treason.

  22. 22
    anandine

    gvlgeologist said: Didn’t the confederacy lose

    What makes you think the war is over?

  23. 23
    slc1

    Re anandine @ #22

    Save your Confederate money folks, the South shall rise again. End snark.

  24. 24
    fifthdentist

    A shiny new Internets to DaveL!

  25. 25
    D. C. Sessions

    unlike Engle, the series of Warner Brother cartoons were funny

    And they had wit. As distinct from being witless.

  26. 26
    D. C. Sessions

    Shit. 5000 in a hour? Why would anyone want to emulate that?

    He was ahead of his time in rightsizing his headcount. There’s a reason the modern Republican Party admires him.

  27. 27
    wscott

    Winning most of the battles but doomed to inevitably lose the war? Actually it’s a pretty good analogy, just not the one he intended.

  28. 28
    twincats

    Raven – “It won’t destroy civilization”.

    Are you kidding?!? Do you how expensive a pair of cherry-red size 13.5 EE Jimmy Choo’s are?

    Dingo

    I think we can all agree that knockoffs (fashionable ones) have to be allowed.

    Think of how many jobs will be lost if all the Payless Shoe Source stores have to be closed! Not to mention Ross and TJ Maxx…

  29. 29
    slc1

    Rew Dingojack @ #20

    As bad as that seems, the British Army took 58,000 casualties on the first day of the Battle of the Somme in 1916.

  30. 30
    WMDKitty -- Survivor

    *snicker* Because Robert E. Lee and Stonewall Jackson were, like, totally successful, right?

  31. 31
    Rip Steakface

    The only fair point I can see here is that the South had a good general in the form of Robert E. Lee… who surrendered at Appomattox. The biggest reason the North won wasn’t its generals (who were even more incompetent than Southern generals!), but because it had industrial capacity out the ass in comparison to the agricultural South. A more recent analogy would be like pitting 1950s Detroit vs. 1950s Kansas – Detroit can manufacture tanks, while Kansas has crazy rednecks with rifles under their bed. Who wins?

  32. 32
    dingojack

    Also one should consider the population differences;
    North c11M vs. South c4M (whites)*. This would have also made winning for the south difficult. [Sort of New York vs Alabama].
    But the south had shorter, internal supply lines and a simpler objective, so it wasn’t all against the Southerners.
    Dingo
    —–
    * I haven’t checked these numbers, I could be wildly wrong, but I believe the ratio would be something of that order.

  33. 33
    slc1

    Re Dingojack @ #32

    The raw numbers were Union: 22 million, Confederacy: 9 million of which 3 million were black slaves.

  34. 34
    dingojack

    OK – 22M to 6M. Sort of New York vs Minnesota (proportionally).
    Dingo

  35. 35
    wscott

    The difference in population in itself might not have been a deal-breaker. (History is full of smaller countries beating larger, better-armed countries.) But the tactics the South used caused them to take more casualties than they inflicted on the North. The North could absorb those losses; the South couldn’t.

  36. 36
    slc1

    Re Dingojack @ #34

    Almost Australia vs New Zealand. He, he.

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