Man, I love Alan Keyes. He can always be counted on to offer a batshit crazy view of almost anything. In his latest Worldnutdaily column he actually claims that Rick Santorum’s candidacy was a set up, a plot to help Mitt Romney get elected. Get ready for some serious whacko:
“Whatever Rick Santorum hopes to achieve, the hard fact is that he is more than likely being set up so that his eventual endorsement of the chosen GOP nominee will perfume Mitt Romney or some other Declaration rejecting, crypto-socialist, elitist faction toy. Given his past penchant for such endorsements, we can be morally certain that he will not hesitate to do so again. Perhaps he will play Sarah Palin to Romney’s John McCain. If so, the ultimate result will be that those who support him are again played for fools.”
I wrote the above quoted passage in an article I posted at Loyal to Liberty Jan. 4 of this year. Now Santorum has withdrawn in circumstances that emphatically verify the suspicion that his candidacy was all along intended “to gain some credibility with the disaffected conservatives in the GOP’s grass-roots base, then lead them over to RINOs like … Mitt Romney. … If this is the objective … many of the anguished, deeply sincere people” who supported his efforts were “simply being set up for another episode of heartbreak and betrayal.” …
Though bad for the people he claims to represent, Santorum’s withdrawal exactly serves the purposes of the GOP elites he has dutifully served in the past. The GOP’s RINO, crypto-socialist elites can now proceed with the coronation of their pre-selected champion. The way is clear for them to use the prospect of Mitt Romney’s inevitable triumph to discourage the voters who reject his socialist, pro-abortion, pro-gay marriage agenda from further participation in the GOP primary process. Meanwhile, Santorum waits in the wings for the moment when he may be called back to the stage to act the part of Judas-goat, playing “Sarah Palin to Romney’s John McCain.”
Sadly I predicted and fully expected what Rick Santorum has done. But when I think of the people who go on buying into the elite manipulated sham he dutifully represents, I cannot tell which is the greater shame – his betrayal of them, or their repeated betrayal of the things they profess to believe. Why do they keep casting before swine the lustrous miracle God works within their hearts? Why do they keep bestowing it upon people who consistently betray God’s work time and time and time again? I know they fear defeat and greater suffering. Yet I also know that many of them profess faith that leads them to look to God for hope. But as the Apostle said, “We rejoice in our suffering, knowing that suffering produces endurance, endurance produces character, and character produces hope. …” (Romans 5:3-4)
That literally had me laughing out loud.
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chrisj
April 17, 2012 at 11:43 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
So millionaires who think they shouldn’t have to pay taxes are now “socialists”? Paging Inigo Montoya…
Michael Heath
April 17, 2012 at 11:45 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Alan Keyes:
The use of ‘morally’ here is a nice illustration of wingnutese. Its use doesn’t enhance our understanding of Mr. Keyes’ assertion, but it sure does illuminate what kind of fruit cake is writing this tripe.
raven
April 17, 2012 at 11:48 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Palin hurt McCain as much as she helped him. Or maybe hurt him even more.
She certainly wasn’t qualified to hold an important national office and her oogedy boogedy cult religion scared a lot of people.
Stevarious
April 17, 2012 at 11:48 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
There is at least one part of this article I heartily agree with:
Republicans are daily played for fools by the people they vote for.
snoeman
April 17, 2012 at 11:56 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
“Crypto-socialist”?
If I had been paying attention in Poli-Sci 100 years ago, would I know what that means?
Randomfactor
April 17, 2012 at 11:57 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
That’s OK. Keyes himself was part of our nefarious plot to make Obama President in the first place. Along with Jeri Ryan. Boy, I love it when a plan comes together on our side.
matty1
April 17, 2012 at 12:00 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Put the dictionary down and back away slowly.
Scott Hanley
April 17, 2012 at 12:08 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
The part I found most convincing was “We rejoice in our suffering.”
d cwilson
April 17, 2012 at 12:14 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Declaration rejecting?
Is he saying that Romney still thinks we’re a British colony?
Michael Heath
April 17, 2012 at 12:21 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
raven writes:
IIRC the exit polling had Ms. Palin hurting Sen. McCain by three points in the national results. I’m not sure how this played out on a state-by-state basis the states where the vote was tight.
Trebuchet
April 17, 2012 at 12:23 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Andy Schlafley of the increasingly wacky Conservapedia was saying the same thing up until a few months ago — that Santorum was a “stalking horse” for RINO Mitt Romney. Then when Santorum became the last Not-Mitt-Romney standing, he suddenly was all for him. Until he dropped out. Now he’s back to being a stalking horse and Conservapedia is proven right.
garnetstar
April 17, 2012 at 12:31 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
What if Santorum’s evil conspiracy had backfired, and he had become the Republican nominee?
He would have had to commit suicide or something, so that his RINO bosses’ plan would succeed!
fifthdentist
April 17, 2012 at 12:44 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
George Lincoln Rockwell, white courtesy phone …
MyPetSlug
April 17, 2012 at 1:13 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
This is all especially funny because who the fuck is Keyes going to vote for? Because we know he’s not voting for “He who must not be named (except by his middle name)”. How much does anyone want to bet that in three months he’s going to write a column, in hysterical prose of course, about how even though Romney is a “crypto-socialist elite” we must vote for him lest civilization itself be destroyed?
Seriously, Keyes is whining about what a betrayal it is that Santorum dropped out, but what is Keyes actually suggesting Santorum do? Run all the way to the convention then bitterly concede and then not endorse Romney? Cause that will really help the chances of Republicans in November.
harold
April 17, 2012 at 1:22 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Boy is this guy nuts.
Everybody knows that Nikki Haley is going to be the Sarah Palin of 2012.
josephmccauley
April 17, 2012 at 2:09 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
I’m with snoeman: What the hell is a crypto-socialist? One that knows codes? Help me here.
Pierce R. Butler
April 17, 2012 at 2:46 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
But God Himself told Rick Santorum to run!
Just how high up does this conspiracy of RINOs go?
Taz
April 17, 2012 at 2:55 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
It’s someone who supports public key encryption.
Zinc Avenger
April 17, 2012 at 3:12 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
I hate crypto-socialists.
I also hate crypto-neo-paleo-laissez-faire-fascistic-communist-anarchist-authoritarian-secular-theocratic-pinko-running-dogs.
D. C. Sessions
April 17, 2012 at 3:23 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Knowing wingnuts, they get all steamy at the very thought.
Stevarious
April 17, 2012 at 3:36 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Well have you ever heard of crypto-zoology? The study of animals that don’t exist?
A crypto-socialist is a socialist that doesn’t actually exist. So he’s actually right about that.
billdaniels
April 17, 2012 at 3:39 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Wasn’t Crypto Superboy’s dog? This plot goes even higher than god, it goes all the way to Superman who was way more powerful and way cooler than god ever was.
chilidog99
April 17, 2012 at 3:51 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Am I the only one who is picking up some repressed wierd gay vibes from Keyes?
“Santorum . . . Perfume,” Santroum playing Sarah Palin, “elitist faction toy,”
Ace of Sevens
April 17, 2012 at 4:06 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Keyes will probably vote for the Constitution party
dontpanic
April 17, 2012 at 11:10 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Okay, Taz got a laugh out of me.
On a Roll, How About a “Wait….What? of the Day? « Foster Disbelief
April 17, 2012 at 9:56 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
[...] to Ed Brayton from Dispatches from the Culture Wars for this gem from Alan Keyes: Though bad for the people he claims to represent, Santorum’s [...]