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Within only a few hours of the unexpected death of Andrew Breitbart, the denizens of Planet Wingnuttia began telling tales of dark conspiracies, of Obama having him killed. Buzzfeed has the first 25 examples from Twitter. Here are a few:
Breitbart Dies; Wingnuts Blame Obama
March 2, 2012 at 11:31 am 
Ed Brayton 
Posted in Wingnuttia 37 Responses to “Breitbart Dies; Wingnuts Blame Obama”
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Had Savage on for the drive home last night for the LOLs, it was all about this. “Well he wasn’t a healthy guy, had heart problems, there doesn’t have to be a conspiracy but there are untracable ways to induce heart attacks…” The main gist was if the tapes breitbart claimed to have on Obama don’t come out, then obviously he was offed. Yeah~
It’s all Obama’s fault – the prosect of another 4 years of Obama in the White House just broke his heart …
One word: iocane powder.
Gotta love the bit about ‘colledge “issues.”‘ One misspelling is worth a thousand words.
PS: Whatever happened to “God’s will” as a cause of death?
All the cool people go to colledge. It’s like college, but edgier. /terroristfistjab
From the LA Times: “His father-in-law, actor Orson Bean, told the Associated Press that a neighbor saw Breitbart fall and called paramedics. Bean also said Breitbart had suffered from heart problems in the past.”
Gee, we have a witnessed “cardiac collapse” in a man with known heart problems. Let’s create some rumors!
Breitbart is rumored (by the various wingnut outlets) to have had some damaging videos of Obama he was about to release, with the Weathermen or SDS … I didn’t know they were enrolling Hawaiian children, did you?
No doubt Breitbart had anticipated Obama’s nefarious plans and had multiple copied of his damning whatever stashed and ready to be leaked on his death. That’s how its done in the movies ala Pelican Brief anyway.
Tweet:
First congratulations to this tweeter on the judicious use of capital letters, that person distinguishes themselves amongst their kind.
As despicable a person as Mr. Breitbart was, it’s still disconcerting to observe a fellow tribal member appearing to celebrate Breitbart’s life to an imagined narrative with a significant amount of zest. I love the logical fallacy of imagining a cause which lacks reason and evidence, and then using that imagined anecdote as evidence validating Mr. Breitbart’s death is representative of the president’s behavior in general.
The christofascist idiots don’t even know their own religion.
God killed Andrew Breitbart. It’s quite clear from basic (fundie moron) theology.
God is in charge of everything.
Everything happens for a reason. God must have let Breitbart die so something better could happen somewhere else.
Of course, this could mean that god hated the guy. In fact, god has been slamming the fundie south central heartland with tornadoes for months now, including a few days ago. It’s clear. God hates fundies.
It was the Irish. They got the elves to kill Breitbart with elven magic for his opposition to Potato Day. Damned Irish! Damned elves! Boycott Keebler!
I doubt it was Obama, heart attacks just don’t fit his MO. Now if he’d been killed with a missile launched from a UAV…
I wonder who failed to complete the job when I had my heart attack in the fall of 2010? PZ’s of course, was caused by a coalition of all religions. However, they obviously do not have the power of Obama’s hit squad.
Huh? I’m aware Bill Clinton gets along rather well with George H.W. Bush, and the two have cooperated on some humanitarian issues such as the Haiti earthquake recovery efforts, but isn’t it quite a step from “cooperating on humanitarian aid” to “conspiring to kill opponents”? What kind of conspiracy theory am I unaware of? Will it have Templars, Illuminati and/or Reptilians?
A man with a history of heart problems and a fondness for cheese burgers who makes his living by screaming at people died of heart problems.
Clearly the only way that could happen is via CIA murder. Nobody with heart problems dies of heart problems unless the lizard people controlled CIA murders them.
BEHAVE YOURSELVES! BEHAVE YOURSELVES! BEHAVE YOURSELVES!
The real conspiracy here is that Breitbart isn’t really dead, of course. It’s all just a plot to make his enemies think he’s dead, as a part of some gigantic sting operation he cooked up with James O’Keefe and Anne Coulter.
No, seriously….
Breitbart is rumored (by the various wingnut outlets) to have had some damaging videos of Obama he was about to release…
How long have these rumors been goinhg around? How long was Brietfart “about” to release the videos?
Also, I agree with Ramel: a “typical Obama move” would be a drone strike or a visit from Seal Team Six, not a quietly induced heart attack. These people are idiots among idiots.
Huh? I’m aware Bill Clinton gets along rather well with George H.W. Bush, and the two have cooperated on some humanitarian issues such as the Haiti earthquake recovery efforts, but isn’t it quite a step from “cooperating on humanitarian aid” to “conspiring to kill opponents”? What kind of conspiracy theory am I unaware of?
The loony right have been accusing Bush Sr. of conspiring to create an evil liberal internationalist “new world order,” ever since he used those words himself right after the fall of the USSR. That’s when we started hearing about “black helocopters” and “jackbooted thugs.”
“Bush/Clinton clan”?…
jimmiraybob @3, someone’s gotta say it. That’s two words.
@ Yoritomo: That bit jumped out at me too. My first thought was also “Huh?” followed by “Non-standard lunatic for the win!”
Re Yoritomo @ #13
Let’s not forget the Masons, the Bilderbergers, the Council on Foreign Relations, the Federal Reserve, the Zionists, and members of Skull and Bones.
neonsequitur:
Ah, that explains why Elvis Presley hired him to work at Elvis’ 7-11,
Either that, or Breitbart was killed by the forces of the Girl Scouts of America. They’ve been radicalized ever since they started admitting trans-gendered girls, after all.
Y’all left out Davos and the UN for a more complete lunatic spectrum of enemies.
It was actually Saul Alinsky (known among the True Believers as `Sal Alinksi’) who did the deed. Sure, Alinsky died in 1972, but HAVE YOU EVER SEEN HIS DEATH CERTIFICATE?
I rest my case.
@ lordshipmayhem. Did the Girls Scouts also admit some of those highly dangerous “action transvestites” Eddy Izzard talks about?
Cause I could totally see them doing it.
Good grief. The only people who brag about having damning video evidence under wraps somewhere are people who don’t actually have any. Otherwise, they’d put the video up on YouTube and then make a big deal of it. There’s no reason to keep holding on to it in secret unless you’re trying to create expectations that cannot be met.
I wouldn’t be at all surprised if the final autopsy report mentions crystal meth and santorum.
If Breitbart was murdered by Obama, how come Arpaio, Limbaugh, Savage, and the rest of the public Obama-haters all still very much alive?
I don’t reckon much to this Chicago-style politics they keep talking about if they can only take down one of the minor players, and only after several years of vocal opposition.
Obama’s almost as bad at acting like an organized crime boss as he is acting like a Socialist.
Lycanthrope@#18 –
Oh sure. In translation. But I was writing in Wingnutese.
I think Planned Parenthood killed Breitbart. Their bloodlust knows no bounds!!1
Has no one considered Shirley Sherrod’s possible involvement? Everyone knows you don’t mess with the USDA. We’re through the looking glass here people. WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO UNDERSTANDS WE’RE THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS HERE PEOPLE?!?
Too soon?
Also,
Typical of what exactly? Is Obama kill crazy for paranoid right wing provocateurs? Are they staking the corpses like cord wood in the west wing or something?
So AB’s dead.
We can stop talking about him now, save in reference when dealing with the flaming shitheels that worked with him.
He’s dead, and few – if any – will miss him.
The Breitbartites can always blame his death on some disgruntled former ACORN employee who slipped poison into his beer at the bar.
@15:”BEHAVE YOURSELVES! BEHAVE YOURSELVES! BEHAVE YOURSELVES!”
Huh? Even as “humor,” I have no idea what this is supposed to mean.
@33
A rather drunk Andrew Breitbart repeatedly shouted those words at a bunch of protestors, around a month or so ago. There’s a video of it around somewhere.
Well, Andy certainly BEHAVING himself.
http://visiontoamerica.org/8531/was-andrew-breitbart-assassinated/#idc-cover
Fun stuff in the comments here, too.
Maybe it was Romney because he was mad Breitbart revealed that he stole New Hampshire.