Rick Perry Makes It Rain!


So says the loony Lou Engle of The Call.

I heard that actually the day that Governor Perry announced that he’s running for president, and this is not an endorsement I’m giving here, it simply it rained I believe he said for five hours, it poured. And people think that that could’ve been a sign, I don’t know. I think that was a historic prayer gathering for a governor to call a true Joel:2 solemn assembly. You don’t always see an immediate answer to these kinds of prayers but God does, God sees and responds and I believe we’ll look back at that gathering as a historic moment in American history and that’s what I’ve got to believe.


Of course you have to believe that, because you’re insane. Yes, it did rain in the upper part of Texas on August 13. And now much of Central Texas is on fire, nearly 200 of them have destroyed thousands of homes. Is God’s aim that bad? Or maybe he’s trying to send a message not to elect Rick Perry? It makes just as much sense as the nonsense you’re selling. Funny how every natural disaster happens to reinforce exactly what you believed all along.

He read Joel chapter 2 and said this is his prescription in times of trouble, it was phenomenal and then he prayed, and in reality really prayed to Jesus, using the name of Jesus. Now people could say it’s a political ploy, listen, I think the church should actually rejoice that someone had the courage, he is in one sense risking political suicide but basically his purpose is, ‘hey I just know I’m not going to succumb to political pressure on this thing, I know we need God.’ Of course Texas is in such a bad state with the drought, the fire, the difficulties. Well the whole nation is and I believe that what he called was very significant for the nation, I was privileged to speak to him just for a few moments and felt the genuineness of his own heart.

Yeah, it’s really political suicide for a Republican politician to blather on about God all the time. Hell, it’s practically a requirement to do so.

Comments

  1. Aquaria says

    Of course you have to believe that, because you’re insane. Yes, it did rain in the upper part of Texas on August 13.

    On August 13th it didn’t rain in:

    Houston (largest city)
    San Antonio (2nd largest city)
    Austin (4th largest city)
    El Paso (6th largest city)
    Corpus Christi (8th largest city)
    McAllen/Harlingen/Brownsville (about a million people live there)

    That it rained on those moronic hayseeds in the north doesn’t help us down here in Central and South Texas. It certainly didn’t help East Texas. My mother was literally surrounded by fire where she lives, but fortunately is okay, and her house is, too.

    I’m afraid a lot more is going to burn before things get better. If they ever do. The NOAA is projecting drought until April, at least, and we may not get enough rain even then to make up for the drought this year.

    Who says climate change isn’t real?

  2. lordshipmayhem says

    I’m still not sure if I should run around claiming the flooding along claiming that the Atlantic States’ flooding is due to Perry’s prayers combined with Gawd’s incredibly bad aim, or whether the drought in Texas is a sign that Texans are being punished for not worshipping Thor. Something as batshit insane as praying to an invisible, impotent, non-existent little ceiling cat.

  3. Aquaria says

    Well the whole nation is and I believe that what he called was very significant for the nation, I was privileged to speak to him just for a few moments and felt the genuineness of his own heart.

    Rick Perry doesn’t have a heart. Whatever you felt, that wasn’t it. And I don’t want to know what it was you did feel, Lou.

    Ever notice when these morons talk about handsome scumbags like Perry, they sound… Well… Enamored?

  4. michael says

    He read Joel chapter 2 and said this is his prescription in times of trouble

    Look out if he ever gets to Joel chapter three, where the shit-stirring really starts:

    Proclaim ye this among the Gentiles; Prepare war, wake up the mighty men, let all the men of war draw near; let them come up: Beat your plowshares into swords, and your pruninghooks into spears (Joel 3:9,10)

  5. DaveL says

    I’m still not sure if I should run around claiming the flooding along claiming that the Atlantic States’ flooding is due to Perry’s prayers combined with Gawd’s incredibly bad aim

    I recall reading an article on flooding in the Susquehanna River valley in rural PA, and sure enough in the comment section there were the fundie ghouls saying how this was what happens when you turn your back on Jesus.

    Did rural Pennsylvania turn into a hotbed of secular humanism when I wasn’t looking?

  6. coragyps says

    We had an earthquake here in Scurry County this morning! One so large you could actually tell that it happened without a seismograph!
    I think it’s God expressing his extreme displeasure with Perry running for President. Well, it could also have been a fault slipping, I guess….

  7. 386sx says

    And people think that that could’ve been a sign, I don’t know.

    So in other words he’s “just sayin”. Lol.

  8. Tim DeLaney says

    Rick Perry has very publicly prayed for rain in Texas, but his gawd has seen fit instead to intensify the drought in Texas. For the sake of your 401(k), let’s hope Perry doesn’t get around to praying for economic recovery.

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