There was poison in the water
And it wasn’t fit to drink;
So we got ourselves together
And we had a little think…
We were told to “just ignore it”
We were told “it’s not so bad”
We were told that sanitation
Was a silly, passing fad
We could just avoid the fountain
We could just avoid the taps,
And the problem would resolve itself
Eventually, perhaps
There are sensible precautions—
Keep your mouth shut as you shower;
If you’re feeling really thirsty,
Maybe boil it for an hour
There are antidotes available
Or so, at least, we’re told,
But they’re getting hard to find these days
And some are rather old
If we get our act together,
We can do it! I can tell…
…And it won’t disturb the fellows
Who are shitting in the well.
16 comments
1 ping
Skip to comment form ↓
scotlyn
June 18, 2012 at 5:05 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Brilliant!
Hisstah
June 18, 2012 at 8:12 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Seriously brilliant.
MyaR
June 18, 2012 at 8:25 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Bravo!
Nentuaby
June 18, 2012 at 8:27 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
For some reason, I automatically processed this in my head as if it were a filk based on “Battle of New Orleans.”
Cuttlefish
June 18, 2012 at 8:34 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Thanks, all!
Nentuaby, that is a fun little exercise–a bit faster than I naturally hear it, but more fun!
thunk = ∫ SQRRAWK! d(MQG)
June 19, 2012 at 1:06 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
St. Petersburg for ya. (last I heard).
It’s more that the water there stinks, however.
embertine
June 19, 2012 at 9:35 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Neatly skewered with your trusty Cuttleink as per usual. *thumbs up*
danoberste
June 19, 2012 at 10:55 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Can I steal this? I’d be delighted to do it with whatever attribution you’d prefer.
Our Water authority is bending over backwards to try get watershed protections in place without asking anything of the developers who are responsible for the runoff.
By the way, it’s GREAT!
Cuttlefish
June 19, 2012 at 10:58 am (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Go ahead and use it–attribute to “Cuttlefish”, or link back here.
It’s interesting–here and on twitter, I’m getting a few comments like this, that see it as a poem about pollution–particularly of waterways. It is, of course, but it is also very much not.
vel
June 19, 2012 at 1:17 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
amazingly good for both environmental subjects and theistic poison. Should be up there with Niemoller’s “poem” “first they came…”
Joan
June 19, 2012 at 6:59 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
(Sung to “Listen to the story of a man named Jed. “)
Well, we might clean up our water
But we’re still left in the lurch
Because nobody is bothering
To purge the Catholic Church.
We could work around the water
If we just could stand the smell
But we can’t assault the Church
Cause it will damn us all to Hell.
Sethra
June 19, 2012 at 8:13 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Applicable to so many things, really. Lovely work!
ginseng
June 20, 2012 at 9:20 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
I didn’t see it as a poem about pollution, I see it as a comment on the current harassment discussion and the MRAs in the skeptic & atheist movement who are poisening the well.
ginseng
June 20, 2012 at 9:20 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
poisoning, not poisening…
Cuttlefish
June 20, 2012 at 9:40 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Ginseng, you win the Uri Geller Mind-reading prize–that was the original intent. It actually makes me very happy to see (at least) two different other interpretations, for 2 reasons. One, it makes the poem more abstract and less concrete (my verses trend very concrete); two, it suggests that the harassment issue is not the only thing on people’s minds. It’s big, but if my brilliant readers aren’t seeing it everywhere, that’s probably a good thing. Um… even though it’s pretty much everywhere. So maybe I shouldn’t be so happy.
Die Anyway
June 21, 2012 at 2:30 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
Darn, I wish I had thought of it as more generic. Unfortunately, there have been so many news stories in our area (Pinellas County, Florida) of poisonous smelling water (and government denial) and actual poisoned groundwater that I assumed it was based on a news item from here.
What the Boss Likes – Poison in the Water | Club Schadenfreude
June 19, 2012 at 1:26 pm (UTC -4) Link to this comment
[...] http://freethoughtblogs.com/cuttlefish/2012/06/18/poison-in-the-water [...]