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Tag Archive: sex

Jun 28 2013

“Women Just Want Men To Take Control.”

[Content note: sex/BDSM] One trope I often hear about women’s sexuality is that “women just want men to take control.”1 I encounter this everywhere–in pickup artist how-to’s, in pop psychology articles, in Cosmo magazines, in Sigmund Freud’s theories. At its best, it’s a harmless meme that simply reflects the gender roles that our society has. …

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Jun 19 2013

Tell Kickstarter Not To Fund This Gross Book About How To Get Laid By Assaulting Women

66f73dd0819ef3cc29d9a3af56b7d41d_large

[Content note: sexual assault] There’s a project that’s just gotten funded through Kickstarter. It’s a book called Above the Game: A Guide to Getting Awesome With Women and it’s being written by a Redditor and pickup artist named Ken Hoinsky. Predictably, the book promises to help men meet and hook up with women. Some quotes …

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Jun 04 2013

[interview] Greta Christina on Writing Dirty Stories

Greta Christina's Bending! Get it from Kindle, Nook, or Smashwords.

[Content note: BDSM] Greta Christina has a new book of kinky erotic stories out. It’s called Bending and I read it and it’s great. So I interviewed her about the book and the process and ethics of writing porn. If you’re curious why I refer to them as “dirty stories” and not “erotica,” Greta herself …

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May 05 2013

[blogathon] Against Pokemon-Style Polyamory

Looks like a pretty strong team!

This is the sixth post in my SSA blogathon. Don’t forget to donate! When I first started exploring and getting into polyamory about a year ago, one of the things that appealed to me about it was this idea of having “different partners” for “different needs.” It made a lot of sense to me and …

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Apr 01 2013

Where Feminism Fails: The Ongoing Need for Men’s Rights Activism

So, this might be kind of awkward given my past writing and activism, but it’s time for me to come clean: I’ve decided to become a Men’s Rights Activist. I’ve realized that feminism’s biggest failure–much more important, in fact, than its historical disregard for women of color, poor women, and trans* people–is that it does …

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Mar 11 2013

Stop Hating On Female Condoms For No Real Reason

Photo on 3-11-13 at 11.03 PM #2

Every time I do this I feel like I’m a really lazy blogger who’s just going for the low-hanging fruit*, but I feel compelled to once again criticize a Jezebel article. Tracie Egan Morrissey, whose writing is usually quite good, has written a post called “Stop Trying to Make Female Condoms Happen.” The post is …

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Feb 27 2013

“We Saw Your Boobs” and Distorted Views of Female Sexuality

I’ll leave it to others to thoroughly excoriate Seth MacFarlane’s performance at the Oscars. What I want to address specifically is his gloating “We Saw Your Boobs” video, and the interestingly skewed notion of sexuality that it presents. If you believe MacFarlane, and others who think like him, sex is a sort of competition between …

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Feb 25 2013

Is It Wrong To Help Someone Cheat?

A while ago, a great blog called Polyskeptic had a post about the ethics of helping someone else cheat. Dan Savage had said on an episode of his podcast that it’s definitely not okay, and Wes of Polyskeptic disagreed. Wes brings up some good points about what exactly is wrong with cheating, and it’s not the …

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Feb 16 2013

“Consent Is Sexy” Is Useful But Also Kind Of Sketchy

Consent is Sexy poster

I’m at the University of Chicago’s Sex Week, where I’ve seen a bunch of great talks, including one by Cliff Pervocracy! So I have sex on my mind (well, as usual). I often write about very well-intentioned principles or campaigns that have blind spots and negative implications. Here’s another example. “Consent is sexy” is one …

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Feb 08 2013

[Forward Thinking] What Would You Tell Teenagers About Sex?

Ask first. Consent is hot, assault is not.

Libby Anne and Dan Fincke are doing this cool thing called Forward Thinking where people blog about values. This week’s question is, what would you tell teenagers about sex? I have a lot of perspectives on this. As a teenager, I wasn’t really told anything about sex–good or bad. A few things, sure. I picked up …

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