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Dec 01 2012

Occasional Link Roundup

New readers: an “Occasional Link Roundup” is when I periodically link to awesome blog posts I’ve recently come across. I tried in vain to do this on a particular day of the week and/or with some sort of regularity, but failed. Now I just do it whenever the hell I want to, hence the name.

Also, you can self-promote in the comments section!

1. The TV show Grey’s Anatomy is a guilty pleasure of mine, but this blog post critiques its approach to disability and mental illness brilliantly.

2. Cassy wrote this account of being harassed on the El. Trigger warning for street harassment. “If you can read this anecdote and still not acknowledge the necessity of feminism, then you have lost the plot entirely. I can’t tell you how often I’m told by men to relax while they attempt to ensnare me, that I don’t know better than they do with regards to a woman’s place in the world, that I should take sexual harassment as a compliment rather than as a privileged affront to my gender, that I’m making a big fuss over nothing if I recoil at the greedy hands of a stranger.”

3. And in response to that, Chana discussed the only appropriate way to respond to a personal story about sexual harassment or assault, and how not to respond.

4. Why labels for sexual orientation/gender identity/relationship style can be really useful.

5. Tips for men who want to be conscious of consent. “In propositioning people, I try to be aware of the effects of rape culture. I know that if I proposition someone for something, and they’re not interested, they have to try to intuit how I’ll respond to rejection. Will I take it gracefully? Will I be an asshole? Will I become belligerent? Not knowing can be scary. What I try to do, insofar as it is possible, is to remove that ambiguity. I try to make it as obvious as I can that I can and will take no for an answer, and to make it as easy as I possibly can for someone to say no.”

6. A writer with depression responds to people who find her mental illness irritating. “I know I’m not much fun to be around right now. I may even be irritating. But making me feel bad about feeling bad isn’t going to make me feel any better.”

7. In defense of polyamory as an orientation rather than simply a lifestyle choice, which is what Dan Savage believes. “A gay man might possess the physical capability of having sexual intercourse with a woman, but what that ignores is that man might not be capable of being happy in a sexual relationship with a woman. It will probably feel on some level deeply unsatisfying, if not downright unnatural….The same is true of polyamorous relationships. I could no more be happy in a monogamous relationship than I could be in a relationship with another man; such a relationship would feel, on a basic level that seems to have nothing to do with conscious choice, deeply unnatural, constricting, and wrong to me.”

8. A definition of sexual objectification. Some of the advertisements shown here are a bit disturbing, just a warning.

9. David Futrelle writes about MRAbot2000, the most hilarious Reddit account I’ve ever seen.

10. How to be a male ally. Just brilliant.

Feel free to self-promote!

 

18 comments

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  1. 1
    helenaconstantine

    I thought you weren’t meant to be a creationist–but I notice you remove comments.

    1. 1.1
      Miri, Professional Fun-Ruiner

      I do. I have a comment policy that’ll be up shortly. :)

  2. 2
    amberhealy

    The link on poly relationships references Dan Savage, but is not from Dan Savage. It’s someone named Franklin Veaux, who practices polyamory.

    1. 2.1
      Miri, Professional Fun-Ruiner

      Yeah, it’s Franklin’s response to Savage, who’s the one that claimed that polyamory is not an orientation. Sorry for the confusion. :)

  3. 3
    researchtobedone

    Can you recommend some other links to personal experiences of assault or rape culture (like the second link)? I want to attempt to compile a list.

    1. 3.1
      Miri, Professional Fun-Ruiner

      Yes! Let me think about it and get back to you. I know I’ve read a bunch of them lately.

  4. 4
    Fliponymous

    If link #4 regarding identity labeling interests you, one of the frequent topics on my blog involves identity labels in the queer, and specifically the bisexual/nonmonosexual population. Other topics include monogamy and bisexuality, the responsibility of the queer community to be welcoming to everyone who identifies as other than straight, biphobia, and a lot of detailed bisexual mythbusting with the occasional potshot at Dan Savage. http://fliponymous.wordpress.com/

    Miriam, thank you for everything you do.

    1. 4.1
      Miri, Professional Fun-Ruiner

      Wow, you even managed to make your self-promotion topical to this post! Impressive.

      For future reference, self-promotion does work a bit better when you link to specific recent posts rather than an entire blog, because that tends to get people’s attention better. In my experience, anyway. :)

      1. 4.1.1
        Fliponymous

        Ooops. I am derp incarnate. Here’s one of the identity politics posts — http://fliponymous.wordpress.com/2012/10/16/mincing-bisexual-or-waking-up-on-the-wrong-side-of-the-procrustean-bed/

        I try to always make my waving of the “me, too! flag” relevant — it’t the difference between ethical self-promotion and spamming other people’s pages. Thanks for the advice.

  5. 5
    Lyla

    Thanks so much for the shout out, and congrats on the move!

  6. 6
    athena1

    Self promotion!
    My musings on the various sorts of 1%’ers.

    http://www.correntewire.com/social_darwinism_and_the_1#more

  7. 7
    Anthony K

    Oh, thanks for these.

    I’ve a friend who asked me for advice on how to talk to her boyfriend about his occasionally misogynist language/attitudes. She thinks he’s reachable, so I suggested sharing “Feminism 101″ links with him. I dunno if that’ll work, but I just sent her “Deconstruction: How To Be A (Male) Ally”.

    Anything else you or your readers might recommend?

    1. 7.1
      Miri, Professional Fun-Ruiner

      You’re welcome! Check out my SJ resources page. For some reason the tabs at the top of the blog aren’t working, but hopefully soon you’ll be able to actually get to it. :)

      1. 7.1.1
        Anthony K

        Awesome, and I assume I can share the link with my friend?

        Thanks again!

        1. 7.1.1.1
          Anthony K

          Also, one would think I’d have the Pharyngula wiki roundup already bookmarked, but such is life.

        2. 7.1.1.2
          Miri, Professional Fun-Ruiner

          Of course! In fact, that’s the idea. :)

  8. 8
    DubsCK

    A) I knew you’d be linked by PZ eventually! Gratz on the FTB move!

    B) I’m freakin’ LOVING the ‘how to be an ally’ link. Your OLR posts tend to equate to “I’m getting nothing done for the next several hours.”

    Gratz again!

    1. 8.1
      Miri, Professional Fun-Ruiner

      Thanks so much! Glad to be helpful for your procrastination. :)

  1. 9
    Around FtB | Pharyngula

    [...] cannot resist linking to Miriam’s link roundup in my link roundup. If we all did this, we could turn the whole internet into a [...]

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