It’s Greek to me

My mom just sent me this to aid in my Blogathoning, with the note “Believe it or not, that first word is “Bob” in Greek…”
I’m half Greek, though you may not realize that from my name – Jennifer McCreight doesn’t exactly have the same ring to it as Crissoula Papadapolopolis. My Papou (Grandpa) was born in Greece, and my Yia Yia (Grandma) grew up there. Since we live about ten minutes from them (think My Big Fat Greek Wedding), I’ve been raised in Greek culture. Except I’ve always failed at one thing:

The language.

My family tried to teach me. When I was little Yia Yia taught me little things – how to count, names of body parts, names of food – but I’ve forgotten almost all of it from disuse. I visited Greece when I was 12, and they bought me what was effectively a “Baby’s First Book” in a last ditch attempt to teach me Greek. At that point I could read Greek letters but had no idea what the words I was saying meant. Now I can’t even do that much.

Looking back, I wish they had taught me more when I was younger able to absorb it. My grandparents were effectively my daycare service, so they could have easily talked Greek around me while my parents spoke English. And then I would have had some of the pronunciations that are specific to Greek that I simply can’t do as an adult. My grandparents and mom still giggle when I fail to say “gala” (which means “milk”) correctly. I can’t do the guttural “g” it requires.

My dad and I even have purposeful bastardizations of certain phrases we can’t pronounce quite right:

“To your health” – stinygiasou – skinny asses

I know the pet names – my grandparents calls me koukla (“little doll”) and my mom calls me zuzuni (“little bug” – don’t ask). I picked up the inappropriate words too – I probably know more Greek synonyms for poop and fart that I do useful phrases. I can still say some things out of rote memorization: “I love you,” “Good night,” “You’re welcome.” My Yia Yia and I even have a little script we go through on the phone:

Yia Yia: Ti kaneis? (“How are you?”)
Me: Kala (“Fine.”)

But I don’t know how to say anything else. I don’t know how to admit I’ve had a bad day, I’m sad, I’m angry… Which is oddly representative of my relationship with my grandparents. I love them so much that they’re not allowed to know I’m not fine sometimes. I don’t want to upset them, which is why they’re probably the only two people on the planet who don’t know that I’m an atheist.

Odd how language represents that.

This is post 8 of 49 of Blogathon. Pledge a donation to the Secular Student Alliance here.

Surving a religious college

From formspring.me: Do you have any advice for surviving college at a very high theist density school?

Start a secular group.

I can tell you from personal experience that it makes life on a religious campus significantly more enjoyable. It’s worth whatever amount of time and effort you have to put into it. While I had made friends prior to starting our group at Purdue, the vast majority of my current friends were made because of our club. It brings like-minded people together. And if you’re feeling overwhelmed by a high theist density school, I assure you other people are too.

But don’t just take it from me. Here’s a excerpt from a review of the Secular Student Alliance conference by Coltara Cady, a new leader in the student freethought movement:

The conservative area of Northwest Arkansas often leaves me feeling alone amidst a sea of indoctrinated blind faith where I rarely find conversations of any depth and often feel hesitant to let people know what I think out of fear of condemnation. I avoid commentary when told things such as ‘bless you’, ‘god provides’, ‘you’ve been blessed’, ‘why weren’t you at church this Christmas’, and other such assertions with a politeness that condones the continuance of their assumptions. I can remember an instance when I corrected a woman on my ankh not being a cross when she happily informed me that she was “also a Christian” and liked my “cross” and was met with almost immediate coldness and disregard: her entire personality did an alarming one-eighty. All I said was “oh, it’s not a cross – it’s an ankh”. I stated nothing more when I easily could have pushed the topic further, such as noting that the symbol was representative of humanism and my love of Ancient Egypt, as well as that it predates the use of the crucifix as a religious symbol by at least five thousand years. It is more likely even older.

…This step into the world of activism and networking with colleagues in critical thinking have filled me with the fire to stand up for myself and evidence-based reasoning. It has given me the fuel to keep my confidence aloft. It has given me the strength to pursue my goals and fight irrationality and injustice. Every penny I spent on this trip was worth it. I feel enriched and stronger as a person, truly emblazoned and full of the drive to make a difference. For some time I’ve considered the thought of leaving the area to more accepting grounds, but now I know that NWA needs me and there are others like me who need the support and assurance I have gotten this past weekend. I will not abandon them in such a time of change and growing awareness that skeptics of all kinds do indeed exist alongside the religious.

Not only is it worthwhile for personal reasons, but you’ll be doing a world of good for your community. Just imagine how many people are too afraid to question their beliefs because of their overwhelming popularity.

Now, I admit starting a secular group can be difficult. It does take a bit of time, so finding at least one other person to help you can be a start. But you don’t have to have particularly lofty goals for your group, especially not at the start. Even five people getting together monthly for coffee is a success. You don’t have to be bringing Richard Dawkins in your first week and have 500 members.

Of course, you may not want to start a group for personal reasons. Maybe you’re not out to your family, and you’d like to keep it that way for a while – totally understandable. Maybe you’re at a religious institution that can’t officially approve your group. Try finding a local non-student group on RichardDawkins.net or MeetUp. That may satiate your non-theist needs, or maybe even network you with another student who can be the figurehead for your group.

You should also contact the Secular Student Alliance. They’ll be able to tell you if someone has started or has thought of starting a group on your campus already. And if not, they’ll be able to help you start your own group. They are a resource you should be exploiting!

And if all else fails…at least you have the internet. Read atheists blogs and be a part of the virtual community. It may not be as good as meeting in person, but it really does help keep your sanity in check.

This is post 7 of 49 of Blogathon. Pledge a donation to the Secular Student Alliance here.

The atheist blogger drinking game

I was trying to come up with various new ways that people could pledge for Blogathon. Money based on word count or insightful posts is nice, but not particularly amusing. If Blogathon is to be truly entertaining, I think it should be participatory. That’s why I’m suggesting a drinking game!

…I just graduated from college, deal with it.

I’ll get us started. Please suggest new rules in the comments. They can be specific to a certain blog (House rules!) or apply to blogs in general. I’ll give alcoholic quantities here, but feel free to exchange them for monetary amounts if you wish to use them to donate to Blogathon.

The Atheist Blogger Drinking Game

Take a drink whenever…
…the blogger uses a synonym for atheist (“godless,” “heathen,” “infidel”)
…the blogger links to another atheist blog
…there’s a joke about eating babies (use caution when reading Friendly Atheist)
…a troll appears in the comments
…a famous atheist is name-dropped

Finish your drink whenever…
…there’s a story that praises religious people for doing something awesome (that isn’t sarcastic)
…the blogger accidentally links to a Poe

Finish everything in the house whenever…
…the blogger converts to a religion other than Pastafarianism

10am CST may be a bit early to start, but hey, it’s Happy Hour somewhere, right?

…And of course I’m not trying to get people inebriated to make them more likely to donate money. Pssshhhh, what do you think I am, some godless heathen?

This is post 6 of 49 of Blogathon. Pledge a donation to the Secular Student Alliance here.

Myers-Briggs tests

From formspring.me: Have you ever taken the Myers-Briggs? What do you think about it?

I have taken the Myers-Briggs – an “official” version too, not just some random version on the internet. As a freshman at Purdue I was selected as part of President Jischke’s Leadership class, a weekly meeting of 30 students from the incoming freshman class who were apparently being primed to be the leaders of the future. Little did they know they were grooming an atheist leader, mwahaha.

Ahem.

But one of the first things we did in the class was take the Myers-Briggs, and then have someone come explain what everything meant and how we could learn to work together better from that. I consistently come out as an INTJ – Introversion, Intuition, Thinking, Judgment. I think the whole description fits me to a T, but I won’t bore you with what you can read on Wikipedia. But just to illustrate my point:

INTJs are analytical. Like INTPs, they are most comfortable working alone and tend to be less sociable than other types. Nevertheless, INTJs are prepared to lead if no one else seems up to the task, or if they see a major weakness in the current leadership. They tend to be pragmatic, logical, and creative. They have a low tolerance for spin or rampant emotionalism. They are not generally susceptible to catchphrases and do not recognize authority based on tradition, rank, or title.

I was going to bold everything that blatantly applied to me, but then I realized I would be bolding the whole quote. Of course, maybe I just like being called a “Mastermind” and being one of the rarest personality types.

While it seems fun, there has been a lot of criticism about the validity and scientific nature of the test. It’s likely it’s relying on the Forer effect, where “individuals will give high accuracy ratings to descriptions of their personality that supposedly are tailored specifically for them, but are in fact vague and general enough to apply to a wide range of people.” This is the same reason why astrology seems so convincing.

But this isn’t my area of expertise – is anyone out the more knowledgeable about the Myers-Briggs test?

Poppycock or not, what result do you get? There’s a decent test here if you want to find out. Do you think it describes you well, or do all the descriptions fit you in some way? I wonder if atheists and skeptics would be more likely to fit in certain categories. Maybe INTJ isn’t that rare amongst skeptics.

This is post 5 of 49 of Blogathon. Pledge a donation to the Secular Student Alliance here.

Secular Student Alliance Conference overview

Alright, I guess this conference was a week ago, and I may or may not have been hording a summary post about it for Blogathon, but…hey, can you blame me? 49 posts is a lot!

Anyway, the Secular Student Alliance conference in Columbus, OH was a blast. Well, minus Hemant’s car falling apart. Hemant has already shared some of his thoughts about the conference, but I wanted to chip in my 2 cents as well.

  • The conference started at 10:30am. I cannot stress how brilliant of an idea this was. The vast majority of people at this conference were college students, and we’re not exactly known for being very functional in the morning. Not only that, but it allowed us to socialize at night without dreading the morning. People were actually at the morning sessions. This doesn’t even happen at academic conferences! For example, this allowed us to play poker without the guilt of staying up late. “Aw, I just have a high King.” “…Jen, you have a flush.” “…Yay!” Yes, I’m that annoying person. Yes, we were gambling with Red Hots. Do not rub your eyes after touching Red Hots. Mark learned this the hard way.
  • The talks were all excellent. And I’m not just saying that, really. I’ve been to biology conferences where I microsleep through the whole thing, or want to scream at the horrible PowerPoint presentation. Not at the SSA conference. Even though the vast majority of talks were by students, they were professional, entertaining, and informative. And thankfully the SSA will be putting videos online soon, so I can share some of my favorites with you!
  • The Society of Non-Theists at Purdue won an award for Best Service Project! Hooray! We got a spiffy plaque for our new office space, and a giant check! Wooooo giant checks!
  • Like always, the best part was meeting fellow students in the freethought movement. Hello everyone! I know some of them were kind of shy saying hi to me because of my blog/boobquake, but I’m just as much in awe of some of the stuff they’ve done. I love networking with new people! And of course it was wonderful seeing familiar faces again, some of which I only get to see at this conference. Speaking of familiar faces:
  • Eating dinner with Greta and Hemant at our tongue-in-cheek “VIP Blogger Table” was fun. There’s a certain level of geekery achieved when you sit around talking about blogging for an hour.
  • I think my talk went over really well! At least, people said they liked it afterward and were laughing at the appropriate moments. I can’t understand why they thought some parts were so funny… Don’t worry, you’ll get a video soon enough.

Some suggestions:

  • Unless the field trip is something special like the Creation Museum, just hold it somewhere we can hang out. The zoo was nice, but most of the fun was due to hanging out with people, not because we were actually in a zoo. No need to spend the extra money and extra travel time when all we want to do is sit and chat.
  • Vary up the talk length a bit more. 20 minutes was great, but I’d also like to see some even shorter talks. Maybe throw in a bunch of 10 minute talks where students can talk about specific events that worked well for their group, or a particular learning experience they had.
  • Now that the conference is getting large enough, I’d like to see two separate tracks going at the same time: think “Beginners” and “Advanced” sessions. As someone who ran a club for three years, most of the information on gaining members or advertising was stuff I already knew. But to someone who’s just starting a group or about to be an officer, it’s invaluable. Maybe have some more sessions for the veterans.
  • One more day! I seriously think the conference could easily last all day Sunday. Heck, the students were chanting for it! I didn’t feel at all burnt out by the end.

Oh, and here’s a snapshot of the back of our club t-shirt. Apparently people liked it, since there are 249782 images of my back tagged on Facebook now.If you were there, what did you like or dislike about the conference?

This is post 4 of 49 of Blogathon. Pledge a donation to the Secular Student Alliance here.

Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality

Are you a Harry Potter fan? And a skeptic? I command you to go bookmark this fanfiction and read it immediately (well, immediately after blogathon is over). It’s called Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality. It’s set in an alternate universe where Harry’s adoptive father is an Oxford professor, and thus Harry is extremely well trained as a skeptical thinker.

I know what you’re thinking. “Come on, fanfiction, Jen? Didn’t you graduate middle school years ago?” But trust me – if you’re one of those people who liked to over analyze the Harry Potter universe, you have to read this fic. I’ve spent many geeky hours pondering the possible genetic inheritance pattern of magical ability. Or how horrible the English and critical thinking skills of wizards and witches must be if they stopped their traditional education at age 11. If you haven’t thought these things, you will now. For example, here’s a snippet of Harry pondering about the economy of the Wizarding World:

So not only is the wizarding economy almost completely decoupled from the Muggle economy, no one here has ever heard of arbitrage. The larger Muggle economy had a fluctuating trading range of gold to silver, so every time the Muggle gold-to-silver ratio got more than 5% away from the weight of seventeen Sickles to one Galleon, either gold or silver should have drained from the wizarding economy until it became impossible to maintain the exchange rate. Bring in a ton of silver, change to Sickles (and pay 5%), change the Sickles for Galleons, take the gold to the Muggle world, exchange it for more silver than you started with, and repeat.

Wasn’t the Muggle gold to silver ratio somewhere around fifty to one? Harry didn’t think it was seventeen, anyway. And it looked like the silver coins were actually smaller than the gold coins.

Then again, Harry was standing in a bank that literally stored your money in vaults full of gold coins guarded by dragons, where you had to go in and take out coins out of your vault whenever you wanted to spend money. The finer points of arbitraging away market inefficiencies might well be lost on them. He’d been tempted to make some sort of snide remark about the crudity of their financial system…

But the sad thing is, their way is probably better.

On the other hand, one competent hedge fundie could probably own the whole wizarding world within a week. Harry filed away this notion in case he ever ran out of money, or had a week free.

Not only is it hilarious, but it’s also full of such good information that it works as a primer to skeptical thinking. Read until Chapter 5 to give it a chance, and if you don’t like it by 10, give up. It’s a quick read, but dangerously addictive.

Thanks to Jesse Galef for showing me this right before Blogathon, thus ruining many hours of productivity for me.

This is post3 of 49 of Blogathon. Pledge a donation to the Secular Student Alliance here.

Two dinosaurs, one species

A fascinating new study suggests that our beloved Triceratops may not be exactly what we think:

DINOSAURS were shape-shifters. Their skulls underwent extreme changes throughout their lives, growing larger, sprouting horns then reabsorbing them, and changing shape so radically that different stages look to us like different species.

This discovery comes from a study of the iconic dinosaur triceratops and its close relative torosaurus. Their skulls are markedly different but are actually from the very same species, argue John Scannella and Jack Horner at the Museum of the Rockies in Bozeman, Montana.

Triceratops had three facial horns and a short, thick neck-frill with a saw-toothed edge. Torosaurus also had three horns, though at different angles, and a much longer, thinner, smooth-edged frill with two large holes in it. So it’s not surprising that Othniel Marsh, who discovered both in the late 1800s, considered them to be separate species.

Now Scannella and Horner say that triceratops is merely the juvenile form of torosaurus. As the animal aged, its horns changed shape and orientation and its frill became longer, thinner and less jagged. Finally it became fenestrated, producing the classic torosaurus form (see diagram, right).

This extreme shape-shifting was possible because the bone tissue in the frill and horns stayed immature, spongy and riddled with blood vessels, never fully hardening into solid bone as happens in most animals during early adulthood. The only modern animal known to do anything similar is the cassowary, descended from the dinosaurs, which develops a large spongy crest when its skull is about 80 per cent fully grown.

This sort of realization is so cool to me because it seems simple and intuitive, but it took us so long to figure out. We know that our contemporary organisms can make great morphological changes as they age – why didn’t we think the same thing about dinosaurs? And when you think of the magnitude of some of these changes, it makes you wonder what other dinos we have wrong. I mean, an alien looking down at our planet probably wouldn’t think a butterfly came from a caterpillar. But that’s an extreme example. Maybe an alien would label a baby and adult chicken differently.

What’s neater is that we can imply some things about the purpose of the frill just from knowing how it changes over time:

The finding has implications for the supposed defensive function of the triceratops’ frill. “If I was a triceratops I wouldn’t want anything too damaging to happen to my frill, as it had numerous large blood vessels running over the surface,” says Scannella. “I don’t imagine holding up a thin bony shield that can gush blood would be a very effective means of defence.”

Instead it is likely that the headgear was a display to signal an individual’s maturity to other members of the species. Differences between the sexes is another possibility but less likely, says Scannella.

But rest assured, Triceratops fans. Torosaurus is the species that is being abolished – our childhood memories are still in tact. Though I’m sure the Blue Ranger will be a little upset knowing he was riding a baby dinosaur this whole time.*

*Yes, I really am that geeky.

This is post 2 of 49 of Blogathon. Pledge a donation to the Secular Student Alliance here.

It was a dark and stormy morning

Blogathon has begun somewhat ominously, with dark clouds, heavy rain, and rolling thunder. It’s not the craziest weather I’ve seen – just a typical Midwestern thunderstorm.

But that got me thinking on how different someone’s idea of “typical” weather can be. If lightning is striking down the block, we’re usually looking out the window instead of running for cover. Power cutting out doesn’t even make us bat an eye anymore. Of course, the last time the power cut out here was while I was watching Inception at our local movie theater, and no one was quite sure if that was supposed to happen or not. That’s how much that movie blew our minds.

The same thing goes for tornadoes.

“Tornado Watch” to a normal person: Take cover, tornadoes may be forming!

“Tornado Watch” to a Midwesterner: OMGCOOL tornadoes may be forming, go plaster yourself to a window to watch for them!

and

“Tornado Warning” to a normal person: Holy shit a tornado! Get in the basement!

“Tornado Warning” to a Midwesterner: Holy shit a tornado! Appreciate that green sky until that thing seems to be ripping off rooftops, then reluctantly march down to the basement.

I didn’t realize how crazy we might sound until I came to college, where I was exposed to people who hadn’t lived in the Midwest their whole lives. You’ve lived through hurricanes? That 4.0 magnitude earthquake that titillated us Hoosiers didn’t even wake you up?! You’re crazy. Excuse me while I go watch energy shoot out of the sky and wind funnels of pure destruction.

The best reaction to our tornado culture had to be from my friend from London. A couple days after he first moved to Purdue, we had our monthly tornado siren check go off. If you’re from the area, you’ll know this as the annoying sound that wakes you up on the first Saturday morning of every month (seriously, Saturday morning? How cruel). We’re so used to the sound that it’s totally ineffective – usually when it goes off we all just sit around discussing it. Hey, is that the tornado siren? Is that for real this time? Does that mean warning or watch? Someone look up the info on their iPhone instead of us immediately taking cover.

His reaction?

“I thought the Germans were coming!”

Priceless.

What natural disasters are you used to? Which ones really freak you out?

This is post 1 of 49 of Blogathon. Pledge a donation to the Secular Student Alliance here.

Don’t forget: Blogathon tomorrow!

This is just a friendly reminder that my 24 hour blogathon for charity starts tomorrow (Sat, July 31) at 8am EST. I’ll be making a new blog post every half hour, which is why you haven’t seen much today – saving up for my 49 posts! We’ve already raised $1,000 for the Secular Student Alliance – double our total from last year – but I know we can do even better.

You can help by spreading the world via blog, twitter, semaphores, or whatever your heart desires. Or you can pledge! Maybe you want to donate for every time I write an especially good post, or whenever I make a bad pun. You get to decide!

The SSA is a fabulous organization that helps atheist, agnostic, and humanist student groups across the country. Among many things, they help provide speakers, fund events and service projects, and provide brochures and aide. If you’re interested in the future of the secular movement, I can’t think of a better organization to support.

Thanks again for your help! I hope you enjoy my increasingly insane sleep-deprived blogging tomorrow. See you bright and early!

If you can’t find a man, settle for the government

Because bureaucracy is the best sugar daddy around. At least, this is the tactic conservative activist Phyllis Schlafly thinks unmarried women are taking (emphasis mine):

Conservative activist Phyllis Schlafly took aim at “unmarried women” at a recent fundraiser and in an interview with TPM, saying that they overwhelmingly support President Obama and are all on welfare. Democrats aim to exploit the comments to pressure the more than 60 Republican candidates who have earned Schlafly’s endorsement.

“Unmarried women, 70% of unmarried women, voted for Obama, and this is because when you kick your husband out, you’ve got to have big brother government to be your provider,” said Schlafly, president of Eagle Forum and infamous for her opposition to the Equal Rights Amendment.

A liberal organization recorded the Schlafly comments at a Troy, Michigan fundraiser Saturday for a Republican congressional candidate, the Detroit Free Press reported. In an interview with TPM this afternoon Schlafly stood by her comments and said Obama is trying to boost welfare rolls to help with his reelection and to help Democrats.

“Yes I said that. It’s true, too. All welfare goes to unmarried moms,” Schlafly told TPM. “They are trying to line up their constituency for Obama and Democrats against Republican candidates.”

…My brain just exploded from all the stupid. Let’s go through this step by step, since hearing those quotes has eroded my ability to form more complex paragraph structure.

1. Not all unmarried women are the result of women kicking their husbands out. Some husbands may have left on their own accord. Or, you know, there’s that option where a woman never had a husband to begin with, but that would probably just blow Schlafly’s mind. Have to take it slowly when we’re dealing with the type of conservatives who go into shock every time a woman leaves the kitchen for a reason other than bringing her man a martini.

2. Regardless of the reason the woman is single, that does not mean a woman needs a provider. Seriously, did we hop in a time machine to the 1950s or something? Can someone let Schlafly know we’re in the year 2010, where women are actually allowed to be educated and have careers? Apparently I’m doing something wrong because I haven’t settled down yet. Well, I’m sure I do a lot of things wrong if we’re using her standards.

3. The idea that all welfare goes to unmarried moms is simply false. Anyone ever hear of Social Security? Medicare? Unemployment benefits? This isn’t a failure to fact check, it’s either willful obliviousness or purposeful deception. You can guess which one I think is more likely.

4. Notice how she interchangeably uses “unmarried women” and “unmarried moms”? You mean women can actually not reproduce?! Inconceivable! Put those baby makers to use, like God intended! But don’t expect any help from the government. That’s just ludicrous.