In which Martin and Tracie give Gavin the respect he’s earned. (Long one, sorry.)
It may seem pointless dealing with the contemptible behavior of trolls, an activity annoying enough for any hundred people. Especially when the troll in question takes this pitifully dishonest tack of assailing us with the most repugnant insults he can come up with (and if you ask me, Matt could hardly be blamed if he knocked Gavin Chandler’s teeth down his throat over the things he wrote about Beth, though of course Matt won’t, because he’s a bigger man than that, and both Matt and Beth have already dismissed Gavin as beneath their notice, let alone their contempt) only to shift gears, apologize profusely, and try to claim that all he was doing was trying to teach us a lesson about how horrible it feels to be abused so awfully, which he seems to think we do to all our callers, and to which he also seems to think his disgracefully juvenile behavior is somehow analogous.
In short, Gavin’s a despicable creep whose failure to make his point effectively — if in fact that’s what he was all about — is so epic it’s hard to wrap your mind around it fully. I didn’t think it was possible, but he’s actually been worse than the lamentable Yomin, whom I did almost sue for libel (and whose life has since spectacularly fallen apart, as he’s currently facing misdemeanor domestic violence charges). Gavin’s like someone who notices that his neighbors have allowed their trash cans to spill over onto his yard, and responds by burning their house down, then saying, “There! You see what it’s like having your property line violated? Be more respectful next time!”
Gavin wrote what he calls his “final” email to us — though there have been several after that, which I won’t read, even though the subject line on one of them is “I am deeply ashamed of myself.” (He should be, but a burnt bridge is a burnt bridge.) Still, with this one, he promised that if we posted it, he’d go away for good. I doubt this, and he’s still commenting like mad on our Facebook page. But here’s the letter, with responses from both Tracie (reprinted from Facebook with permission) and myself, in the hopes (eyeroll) that he’ll live up to his promise.
Yes, I know, feeding trolls only makes them come back for more. But I weigh the instructive value of doing this kind of thing to be worth something, if only so that people know what’s out there awaiting you when you do what we do, and how desperately people will distort the facts to make a point that really wasn’t all that earth-shaking to begin with. Still, I’ll understand anyone who thinks any more attention given this kid is unwarranted, and chooses to skip this post.
Gavin’s subject line on this one was “AETV – A Respectful Presentation of My Actual Concerns.”
I decided to gather my thoughts, take a hot bath, and write a message free of insults and hate, to clearly explain my concerns. This email is the result.
Tracie: I can hardly wait.
There’s more to life than the first amendment. What about being calm and collected when you take viewer calls? You should try that. You’d reach more hearts and minds that way.
Tracie: Very insightful from the guy who submitted nothing but letter after letter full of laughable lists of ridiculous slanders as his input to reaching hearts and minds.
Martin: The Atheist Experience has run continually since 1997, when I suspect Gavin was still playing with Transformers. For most of that time it has been a live call-in show. The entire time, it has been a learning experience. One of the things about live television is that you never know what you’re going to get. A call can start well then go south in a hurry. A theist you thought might be a jerk may turn out to provide interesting conversation, while a self-described atheist (lookin’ at you, Charlie) may turn out to be a total douchey troll.
When I was host, I lost my temper a couple of times, which I’m not proud of. But you know, that’s all part of learning. I also recall many heated debates with Christian callers — and before the days of YouTube and streaming, most of our callers were Christian — that nonetheless never collapsed into name-calling and rage.
Still, discussions between Christians and atheists can get heated simply by their very nature. For believers, their emotional attachment to the faith is so powerful that it’s hard for them not to blow a gasket when confronted by a confident atheist argument. And no two callers are the same, even when, as today, most of them are fellow atheists.
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