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Jan 13 2010

Stay classy, Pat

We’ve gotten an email at the TV show address alerting us that on today’s 700 Club episode, Pat Robertson has gone into his usual “blame the victims” spiel regarding the Haitian earthquake. Apparently God decided to level Port-au-Prince, kill untold numbers (estimated to be in the hundreds of thousands), and displace at least 3 million people, because in the 19th century the Haitians “made a deal with the devil to free themselves from the French.” Setting aside the native Vodou religion (which is where Pat gets his debbil from), let us remember that the Haitian Revolution is the only successful slave revolt in history, bringing to an end a minority rule by the French that was enforced — in the way slavery is always enforced — with an oppressive caste system and violence. I guess that’s the way Pat prefers things.

Pat has clearly created his God in his image: they’re both despicable douchenozzles. Decent people, on the other hand, are encouraged to help.


Here it is right from the scumbag’s mouth.

13 comments

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  1. 1
    Mark B

    God is so behind on his to-do list that he's just now getting to the 19th century?

  2. 2
    Darius Whiteplume

    I was not sure I could hate ol'Pat any more than I do. Thanks for the fuel.

  3. 3
    Thomas

    @Mark BOh, that explains a lot. So, if Heaven is the poorly managed, what would hell be like? I imagine it would be like a Disney World of misery. You wait in line 50 years, get stabbed in the rear-rectal-area with a pitchfork, and then wait in line for something else.

  4. 4
    Lurker

    "Douchenozzle" is coming back in vogue? EXCELLENT.

  5. 5
    Jebus

    I would like to see the supossedly moderate mainstream christians denounce this complete asshat.Somehow i think i might be waiting a while.

  6. 6
    Olivier

    There's also the whole deal with the Vodou religion being very much influenced by Christianity, to the point that the vast majority of spiritual figures in Vodou are equated to a Christian saint or other figure, and, well, to oversimplify it, Vodou pretty much equates its rituals (often with a few Christian elements added in) to the worship of both Christian figures and non-Christian spirits or other Vodou concepts. So, no deal with the devil there, even from a Christian perspective. From an assclown-Christian perspective, however…But the slavery issue definitely is the stupidest and most objectionable part. Just pointing out he did not do the best research on exactly why his God would decide to sic an earthquake (and a hurricane too, not so long ago) on a bunch of innocents. Then again, his God might just do it for the lulz.

  7. 7
    Tyronomo

    As i see it, Pat as a TV evangelical right has a vested interested to demonize the Haitians. Money. Every dollar his 'flock' send to Hatti is one he won't receive. Now, this is how I define evil.

  8. 8
    March Hare

    This is absolutely dispicable, how can Pat Robertson even claim to be Christian, or even human?According to him the Haitian's of hundreds of years ago made a pact with the deveil(???) and because of this following generations are being punished. Fits in well with the concept of Original Sin in Christianity.

  9. 9
    Travis Morgan

    I think its great. It just goes to show how theists cherry-pick what to call divine intervention and what not to. How can other theists give him $hit when his claim is no less justifiable then their claims are of their prayers being answered, miracles occurring, etc… If the earthquake had only of killed a few, theists would be quick to jump on the bandwagin to call that a miracle, and there are those who survived this that attribute their survival to divine intervention, and theists might agree with them. But when something bad happens, they don't want to agree to it being divine intervention. Where is the ol' argument, "god works in mysterious ways, and knows what is best for us and this must be best for the haiti people." now? Yea, I didn't think so. Because like his claim of this being the result of divine intervention, their claims are just as unsubstantiated and ridiculous. They thank and blame god instead of the doctor for surviving a dangerous surgery or the likes, etc… Now, I am not defending Pat, I am merely pointing out the double-edged sword of theists being able to call out, "it's a miracle, its a blessing" for practically anything they wish. It shows how silly their claims are.

  10. 10
    DavidCT

    What a sanctimonious pile of bat guano. What more evidence does anyone need that there is no god. Shepard Smith must be in league with the devil to be critical of such a humble follower of Jebus.

  11. 11
    JT

    What happens if you break a deal with the devil? Does the devil take you to court? Does the god uphold it? Can you get off with a simple breech of contract?Or does it come down to the devil being an extremely honorable being that only takes your soul if you make that deal.. and he doesn't forge your signature?I'd like to see the legal code that describes the policies about supernatural contracts.

  12. 12
    Ing

    "What happens if you break a deal with the devil? Does the devil take you to court? Does the god uphold it? Can you get off with a simple breech of contract?"According to D&D Devils are Lawful evil and bound by the letter of their word. So they uphold their end of the deal to the letter, but love to frame it in a twisted faustian deal so you loose. If you break your end…it's typically a painful process.

  13. 13
    magx01

    What kills me about such proclamations is that they are implicating their supposed god in such acts without even realizing it. I mean, he has the power to wipe out Satan, correct? The answer I always hear is yes, he will. Well, okay, he's operating on some mysterious timetable, but in the interim, he is then idirectly responsible for everything Satan does.Yet he's omnibenevolent…..

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