What a Nuckolhead!

There’s this homeschooled scientific illiterate named Dan Nuckols who’s got a blog where he offers dippy anti-science cartoons like this one, amongst other twaddle. Pharyngula readers have been having good fun today knocking the poor dope around, and I, being the mischievous little scamp I am, decided to fuck with him via email. Here’s the email exchange in progress, starting with my response to the linked cartoon.

Subject: I wuz robbed!
You mean I’ve been an atheist evilutionist all this time, and nobody told me about the porn and the sacks of money!? What a ripoff!

Dan: Dude, you are robbed. Of eternal life. Repent and Trust Jesus.

MW: But the Flying Spaghetti Monster hath touched me with his noodly appendage, granting me not only eternal life but all the pizza I can eat without getting fat, and free digital cable! Plus I don’t have to go to Sunday School. Just seemed like the better deal to me all around.

Thanks though. Tell Jesus I suggested he offer some additional perks to the eternal life deal. Say, NBA seasons passes or something. Otherwise eternity can get awful boring without anything to do!

Update: Hours and hours later, and no followup? How pathetic. Maybe this is another example of what Stephen Rogers was calling half-hearted evangelism.


  1. says

    My favorite was where he compared not believing in god to not believing in gravity. Of course, he forgot the other option, just because you believe something exists does not mean that it does.