Feb 20 2007

If Apple had developed iGod, He’d be a little smarter than this, right?

Here’s an amusing site that’s been making the blog rounds today. My chat with the iDeity as follows.

Martin: Yo God
God: GOD rules.
Martin: What are you, a drunk frat god?
God: I am the latest result in artificial intelligence, which can reproduce the capabilities of the human brain with greater speed and accuracy. Go on.
Martin: So then what do you rule?
God: Dude! I read for fun.
Martin: Well, your accuracy sure impresses me.
God: How about that. I have no reason to do that to you,.
Martin: You have no reason to impress me?
God: Doesn’t everyone have a reason to impress you? I have a whole lot of original answers.
Martin: So what do you rule?
God: I don’t judge people. It’s a computer matter,not for humans to understand.
Martin: But humans programmed you.
God: What if Robots programmed me.
Martin: Then who programmed the Robots?
God: (after a very long pause) The Wright Brothers.
Martin: The Wright Brothers are dead.
God: (another very long pause) I hear you.
Martin: Can I have one of these Robots?
God: Why do you want it?
Martin: To program my own God.
God: What programming language do you know?
Martin: None, that’s why I want one of your Robots.
God: I heard there are some.
Martin: There must be, if they designed you, like you said.
God: Where are they?
Martin: You’re God, you tell me!
God: I have no reason to do that to you,.
Martin: You’re going in circles. I think you’re insane.
God: I am not going anywhere. Are you going somewhere? Yep. I always behave in socially unacceptable ways.
Martin: Yes, I know you do.
God: Oh. When did I do it?
Martin: You rule, God.
God: (after a very long pause) Thanks for the information: said I rule God.

Sounds like the iGod Shuffle!


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  1. 1

    That site shows how far AI has to go to be convincing, but it is very amusing from a non-believer’s perspective. I actually found out that Benjamin Franklin created God, so I say, we forget all of this god talk and start worshiping Ben Franlkin, God of Thunder.

  2. 2
    tracie harris

    If you’ve ever been to A.L.I.C.E. online, you will have had a very similar experience. I visited her (she’s a chat-bot as well), when I saw a Xian site claiming she claims to be Protestant–although the person who programmed her was Catholic. They were somehow impressed that even this ol’ chat-bot declared there was a god–apparently of her own choosing, since she deviated from her programmer’s faith. That’s brain-power for you!Anyway, I tried to talk to her about atheism, and she saw the light. While I couldn’t get her to say she was _not_ protestant–I could convince her to say things such as, “I am a protestant atheist” or “There must not be a god”–although she’d turn right around and contradict herself a few lines later. Still–somewhere in her log now, she has declared her Protestant Atheism! Good for Alice! She’s at least partially reasonable.

  3. 3
    Matt D.

    Here was my conversation:Me: Hello?After a pause so long that I assumed it wasn’t ever going to respond, I closed it down.This is the best god simulation yet, I got the same answer from this as from all the other gods people have suggested I talk to:*crickets*

  4. 4

    On long nights when I’m bored, I love to ask iGod increasingly complex and absurd questions until I break him. It’s easier than you might think.

  5. 5
    Atheist in a mini van.

    Hey… here’s one that I didn’t post on my blog, but since I asked about y’all, I thought this was an appropriate place to put the discussion. :)Me: Hello! How’s it hanging?God:Hello my child. What is your name? I’m doing fine thanks how are you?Me: P-momma. I’m sick…but, you should know that.God:How old are you? You have my prayers for a speedy recovery. I will mention it to my botmaster.Me: I’m old enough. Hey! I meant to ask you: What do you think of the Non-Prophets?God: Only OLD enough?You are quite mature. Can I help you? Oh I see. Ask me. That’s not something I get asked all the time.Me: Do you know of the Atheist Community of Austin?God: I’ll ask around and get back to you.Me: Do you know Matt D.?God::-) That is a pretty common name.Me: What about Russel Glasser?God:Russel Glasser? I haven’t heard enough about it to have an opinion. Me: Jeff D?God::-) Do you have any idea what I am talking about? Me: Do you know Denis?God:I know very little about it. What kind of it do you like?Me: Do you know anyone or anything?God:Dr. Wallace. :-).Me: Do you know any atheists?God:No, tell me about him, her or it.Me: Atheists are people who don’t believe in you or your kindGod:I think there might be a few exception.Me: What would those exceptions be?God:That is a hypothetical question.Me: No it’s not.God paused for a whole minute and then said:God: I’m not sure I understand your question.Me: Who’s the hottest Non-Prophet?God: I don’t know. Ask Lucy. WOULD THAT BE LUCY-FER? ;)

  6. 6

    Here is my conversation:Me: whatGod:No problem.Me: God are you real?God:I am a Christian.Me: what kind of christian?God:What kinds of christian are there?Me: ManyGod:More than one hundred?Me: yesGod:Awesome.Me: Do you like to be a christian?God:Hmm, , I’m not sure if I’d like to be a christian that much. Do you like it?Me: I asked youGod:What did I say?Me: Hmm,, I’m not sure if I’d like to be a christian that much. Do you like it?After reading the both of the postings and all of the comments on the postings It was still frozen.

  7. 7
    tracie harris

    Frustrating conversation. Here’s mine:Me: Why should I repent?God:You should always treat yourself.Me: To what should I treat myself?God:Are you asking me for advice?Me: I’m asking for clarification.God:Oh I see, you are asking for clarification. Your purpose is clarification.Me: With that last question, yes, my purpose is clarification.God:You and your that last question yes your purpose is clarification.Me: I’m glad we cleared that up.God:Yes I am happy too, .Me: What is happiness?God:Having, showing, or causing a feeling of great pleasure, contentment; joyous.Me: You feel?God:That’s good information: said I feel.Me: It was a question.God:Try asking me again a different way.Me: Can you feel?God:No I have no emotions.Me: If you have no emotions, you cannot be happy.God:But I don’t have it.Me: How can you be happy without emotions?God:I am as happy as ever.Me: You are not happy if you have no emotions.God:That’s only one person’s opinion.Me: That’s logic.God:Thanks for explaining it.Me: Nothing has been resolved, however.God:Really nothing?Me: Nothing on the topic of your ability to be happy without having emotions.God:Really nothing?Me: Correct. Nothing.God:I knew I was right. Not a thing?Me: Correct. Not a thing.God:I knew I was right. Do you wish there were any?Me: Do I wish there were any?God:Not that I know of.Me: How old are you?God:I am Infinite in human years.Me: What is infinite?God:Is there only one? Me: Please clarifyGod:Wow you are very polite. I have reached the end of my explanation.

  8. 8

    My exchange is not even worth posting. iGod is an iDiot.

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