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Sep 12 2012

I get e-mail: Mitt Romney is super likable

Sometimes I get e-mail that I have to share.

Subj: FW: Why should we vote for Mitt Romney when he is such a despicable unlikeable guy?

This is the man who should be President of theUnited States!

A lot is being said in the media about Mitt Romney not being “likable” or that he doesn’t “relate well” to people.  Frankly, we struggled to understand why.

So after much research, we have come up with a Top Ten List to explain this “unlikablility.”

Top Ten Reasons To Dislike Mitt Romney:

1. Drop-dead, collar-ad handsome with gracious, statesmanlike aura. Looks like every central casting’s #1 choice for Commander-in-Chief.

2. Been married to ONE woman his entire life, and has been faithful to her, including through her bouts with breast cancer and MS.

3. No scandals or skeletons in his closet. (How boring is that?)

4. Can’t speak in a fake, southern, “black preacher voice” when necessary.

5. Highly intelligent. Graduated cum laude from bothHarvard Law School and Harvard Business School…and by the way, his academic records are NOT sealed.

6. Doesn’t smoke or drink alcohol, and has never done drugs, not even in the counter-culture age when he went to college. Too square for today’s America?

7. Represents an America of “yesterday”, where people believed in God, went to Church, didn’t screw around, worked hard, and became a SUCCESS!

8. Has a family of five great sons….and none of them have police records or are in drug rehab.  But of course, they were raised by a stay-at-home mom, and that “choice” deserves America’s scorn.

9. Oh yes…..he’s a MORMON. We need to be very afraid of that very strange religion that teaches its members to be clean-living, patriotic, fiscally conservative, charitable, self-reliant, and honest. 

10. And one more point…..pundits say because of his wealth, he can’t relate to ordinary Americans.  I guess that’s because he made that money HIMSELF…..as opposed to marrying it or inheriting it from Dad. Apparently, he didn’t understand that actually working at a job and earning your own money made you unrelatable to Americans. My goodness, it’s a strange world, isn’t it?

*****************************************************

Personal Information:

His full Name is: Willard Mitt Romney

He was Born: March 12, 1947 and is 65 years old.
His Father: George W. Romney, former Governor of the State of Michigan

He was raised in Bloomfield Hills , Michigan
He is Married to Ann Romney since 1969; they have five children.

Education:
B. A. from Brigham Young University, J. D. and M.B.A. from Harvard University

Religion:
Mormon – The Church of Jesus Christ of the Latter-Day Saints

Working Background:
After high school, he spent 30 months in France as a Mormon missionary.

After going to both Harvard Business School and HarvardLaw School simultaneously, he passed the Michigan bar exam, but never worked as an attorney.

In 1984, he co-founded Bain Capital a private equity investment firm, one of the largest such firms in the United States.

In 1994, he ran for Senator of Massachusetts and lost to Ted Kennedy.

He was President and CEO of the 2002 Winter Olympic Games.

In 2002, he was elected Governor of the State ofMassachusetts where he eliminated a 1.5 billion deficit.

Some Interesting Facts about Romney:

Bain Capital, starting with one small office supply store in Massachusetts,

turned it into Staples; now over 2,000 stores employing 90,000 people.

Bain Capital also worked to perform the same kinds of business miracles again and again, with companies like Domino’s, Sealy, Brookstone, Weather Channel, Burger King, Warner Music Group, Dollarama, Home Depot Supply and many others.

He was an unpaid volunteer campaign worker for his dad’s gubernatorial campaign 1 year.

He was an unpaid intern in his dad’s governor’s office for eight years.

He was an unpaid bishop and state president of his church for ten years.

He was an unpaid President of the Salt Lake Olympic Committee for three years.

He took no salary and was the unpaid Governor ofMassachusetts for four years.

He gave his entire inheritance from his father to charity.

Mitt Romney is one of the wealthiest self-made men in our country but has given more back to its citizens in terms of money, service and time than most men.

And in 2011 Mitt Romney gave over $4 million to charity, almost 19% of his income….

Just for comparison purposes, Obama gave 1% and Joe Biden gave $300 or .0013%.

Mitt Romney is Trustworthy:

He will show us his high school and college transcripts.

He will show us his social security card.

He will show us his law degree.

He will show us his draft notice.

He will show us his medical records.

Mitt Romney’s background, experience and trustworthiness show him to be a great leader and an excellent citizen for President of theUnited States.

You may think that Romney may not be the best representative the Republicans  could have selected. At least I know what religion he is, and that he won’t desecrate the flag, bow down to foreign powers, or practice fiscal irresponsibility.

I know he has the ability to turn around this financial debacle that the current regime has gotten us into. We won’t like all the things necessary to recover from this debt, but someone with Romney’s background can do it.

But, on the minus side, he never was a “Community Organizer”, never took drugs or smoked pot, never got drunk, did not associate with communists or terrorists, nor did he attend a church whose pastor called for God to damn the US.

If you care about the United States of America– Send this to all your friends!

27 comments

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  1. 1
    Tom Foss

    Oh man, the bit about him not inheriting his money is priceless. Let’s ignore the Romneys’ opulent wealth, and that this “patriotic” religion led Mitt’s dad to be born in Mexico because Grandpa Romney fled the U.S. over polygamy laws. Mitt made his money by looting other companies and exploiting tax law loopholes, leaving bankruptcy and unemployment wherever he went, and his Olympics cost more than any other in the United States.

    Oh, and as for honesty, he refuses to show his tax returns, after a long history of lying about taxes. Nope, nothing to hide there.

    Man, if not for the lies, racism, and omissions, this would be a really convincing e-mail!

  2. 2
    Yoritomo

    Poe is strong with this one. I vaguely hope the entire mail is a parody. Or maybe at least you added the boldface?

  3. 3
    Ashley F. Miller

    Originally it was all boldface and broken up into many lines. It’s not a Poe because it’s from someone I know who means it.

  4. 4
    Argle Bargle

    It’s not a Poe. There are people who really believe Romney is more fit to be President than Obama.

  5. 5
    rory

    I’ll give Romney this: he’s awfully well-preserved for 65. I wouldn’t have guessed he was that old. Must be all the clean-living.

  6. 6
    Loqi

    It’s because his handlers keep him in a freezer when he’s not in use.

  7. 7
    Randomfactor

    Because of his higher albedo.

  8. 8
    Randomfactor

    Clean living and hair dye.

  9. 9
    warrene

    Of the 4 mill mittens gave to charity 2.6 was his tithe to the church, to make up for shorting them the year before. You are not a self made man when daddy pays for you to go to college for 10 years.

  10. 10
    warrene

    He will show us his high school and college transcripts.

    He will show us his social security card.

    He will show us his law degree.

    He will show us his draft notice.

    He will show us his medical records.

    Nobody cares

    So what?

    Big deal

    From when he was in France?

    Why?

    How about the same tax returns he showed McCain 4 years ago? Will he show us that?

  11. 11
    coragyps

    Randomfactor wins the Interwebs for the entire friggin’ week!!!!

  12. 12
    Zinc Avenger (Sarcasm Tags 3.0 Compliant)

    What, he’s not going to show his dry-cleaning history? I smell a fake.

  13. 13
    RKHB

    Yeah, but who looks better in a Speedo?

  14. 14
    Tracey

    As for draft notice; President Obama was too young for Viet Nam. Unlike Bush, Cheney, Rove, and Mittens, all of whom had better things to do than to fight–that was for the “little people”.

  15. 15
    betheves

    As to the law degree, didn’t Obama graduate magna cum laude?
    He also has been married to only one woman.
    His daughters have not gone to jail or done drugs.

    And as to Romney not having any help in making his money…uh, so, the trust funds and stocks from daddy that enabled Mitt and Ann to ‘struggle’ through school don’t count?

    As for the unpaid bits, it must be nice to be able to turn down the money of multiple million dollar jobs as you do them.

  16. 16
    davidjanes

    What cora said! I am so stealing that line!

  17. 17
    Argle Bargle

    Since Romney was already a multi-millionaire when he took those unpaid jobs, the likelihood of his wife losing her dressage horse was small.

  18. 18
    Reginald Selkirk

    8. Has a family of five great sons….and none of them have police records or are in drug rehab.

    But some of them have had children using IVF, which we all know kills precious snowflakes.

    And in 2011 Mitt Romney gave over $4 million to charity, almost 19% of his income…

    Sorry, but I insist on a separation of religious giving from true charitable giving before I can respect that. If he gave a lot of money to the One True Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, I have to think that some of the money didn’t go to help the poor, it went to run ads against gay marriage.

    10. And one more point…..pundits say because of his wealth, he can’t relate to ordinary Americans. I guess that’s because he made that money HIMSELF…

    Well no, it’s because of numerous actions and statements from the candidate which indicate that he can’t relate to ordinary American. Like when he told a group of college students to start a business by borrowing money from their parents. Not everyone is the child of an auto executive. (And what was that again about his being a self-made man?)

  19. 19
    Chaos Engineer

    Apropos of nothing, I was reading the other day that Romney’s path to victory involves getting 60% of the white vote, which is a feat that’s only been managed once in recent history (Reagan-Mondale in 1984.)

    This is the last Presidential election where anyone’s going to try to do that. Starting in 2016, it’ll be impossible to win with just the white vote; at the very least, you’ll also need a decent share of the Hispanic vote. The Bushes and McCain knew this and did a pretty good job of trying to set up the groundwork for future elections, but their party has…regressed…since then.

  20. 20
    Corvis illustris

    As for transcripts: name a presidental aspirant before Obama for whom hs/college/law school transcripts have ever been made an issue. Now, tax returns have been made public ever since Romney back in the 1960s … uh, wait, is that the same guy or …

  21. 21
    Corvua illustris

    As to the law degree, didn’t Obama graduate magna cum laude?

    IIRC he edited the law review, which indicates high class rank and pretty much verifies the degree. (It pains me to admit that the ineffable Ann Coulter had the corresponding honor at Michigan Law.)

  22. 22
    amadan

    Jospeh Smith, 18 May 1843:

    “I prophesy in the name of the Lord God of Israel, unless the United States redress the wrongs committed upon the Saints in the state of Missouri and punish the crimes committed by her officers that in a few years the government will be utterly overthrown and wasted, and there will not be so much as a potsherd left for their wickedness.”

    Does that qualify as a pastor cursing America?

  23. 23
    jamessweet

    Let’s get some perspective here: As far as ordinary folks go, Mitt Romney is EXTREMELY likable. You don’t get this far in politics without having extraordinary natural charisma, and (with a few exceptions) being relatively good looking. Romney is probably handsomer than most, though as a straight male I’m not always the best judge of these things*.

    When people talk about Romney having a likability problem, they are talking about POTUS-level likability. There is no doubt he is likable; but his tone-deafedness on class issues is a liability in a national election given the level of media scrutiny.

    * I’m not trying to do the homophobic “Ew I don’t like men so I can’t say if one is good-looking.” I can tell a Brad Pitt from a Steve Buscemi, but I’m really just honestly not that great at judging these things. Still, it’s obvious Romney is handsome man. Handsomer than most male politicians his age? I’m pretty sure, but that is making a fine judgment call on male attractiveness that is a little beyond my ability.

  24. 24
    ashleybell

    I think you mean he’s likable to people just like him…And The RNC itself understands that he’s disconnected and not well liked in general. The current spin the’yre trying to put on his personality is proof of that. And when has ‘good looks’ ever translated to mean ‘well liked’

  25. 25
    feather brown

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  26. 26
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  27. 27
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