Not the Ducks! – Christians Against Gardasil

When the mom of a 15-year-old Indiana teen saw the Merck “One Less” campaign, she made sure her daughter Maddie got vaccinated with Gardasil.

After the first dose, Maddie started having pain and fatigue.

After the second one, she was in such bad shape she couldn’t even go to school.

Her mom now says that she wishes she could have “a do-over,” in deciding to have Maddie get the shot.

This is a common trope among the anti-vax. This entire piece are from a group of Christian Quacks. The claim they used to be famous for is that Biblical Lifestyle fights cancer. That rogue cancer cells would simply up and vanish if you waggled the divine knowledge of the Bible at them. Which is mighty polite.

In reality? A lot of people have died by following this piece of religious quackery.

The entire argument against the HPV vaccine boils down to two stances.

1. It will turn all our children into sluts! If there were no consequences to sex they wouldn’t have it! The fear of cervical cancer should make them fear sex!

2. Usual anti-vax bullshit.

So this was a piece of mail I got. Weird.

But she’s just one of over 31,000 young girls who have sent in reports to the FDA about adverse Gardasil vaccine reactions.

Those reports include cases of seizures, paralysis…and death.

And all the while the CDC continues to say the vaccine is safe. And it does that in a very clever way — one that is pure marketing genius.

Because when you hear these assurances, you’ll never realize that Big Pharma’s PR department is the CDC.


Actually there have been a handful of deaths in the USA that seem to be caused by Gardasil.

And as usual we see the notion that 31,000 young girls have had seizures, paralysis and death. Except this is false.

As of April 2014, more than 170 million doses of Gardasil had been distributed worldwide. The vaccine was tested in thousands of females (ages 9 to 26). It does not contain mercury, thiomersal, live viruses or dead viruses, but virus-like particles, which cannot reproduce in the human body.

The majority of side effects are minor. Remember that 31,000 adverse effects number? Keep it in mind.

So side effects? Fainting and pain around the injection site. In other news? Surgery is painful.

There is a higher amount of syncope associated with the vaccine. And there is a simple solution to it. Keep the patient seated for 15 minutes.

Other side effects are joint/muscle pain, fatigue, weakness and malaise.

In the USA there have been 23 million doses of the vaccine. Out of which there have been 12,424 adverse reaction. If one notes? That is a much smaller number than 31,000 as claimed by the “Religious Quack”. This is from the same person who claims you can treat cancer by prayer and eating a “Biblical Diet”. Most side effects were the same as all other vaccines. Things like allergic reactions and pain. The majority were minor.

The major ones? Thromboembolic events. Basically? Some people clot a lot and this has resulted in… deaths. Imagine some incredibly serious music here. The anti-vax are right!

There have been 56 reports of thromboembolic events. 19 cases of pulmonary embolism. 4 were fatal. FOUR.

In total out of all those millions of doses? There were just 32 deaths.

0.003% of the total number of doses have a serious side effect, 0.0001% of doses leads to death.

Each year the incidence of Cervical Cancer is 16 per 100,000. The fatality rate is 9 per 100,000. Over 60 years that’s 960 per 100,000 and 540 per 100,000 deaths. If we work that out per million that is 5,400 deaths and 9,600 cases. Which is a much higher number than 1 per million directly associated with the disease (subtracting the error and deaths due to other causes incidental to the vaccine)

And the joke is these figures are from VAERS, that beloved system of anti-vax misrepresentation.

Other adverse events include local site reactions (7.5 cases per 100,000 doses distributed), headaches (4.1 cases per 100,000 doses distributed), hypersensitivity reactions (3.1 cases per 100,000 doses distributed), and urticaria (hives) (2.6 cases per 100,000 doses distributed).

 A Kaiser Permanente study tracking 190,000 girls and women post-vaccination for two years found that rates of the autoimmune disorders lupus, rheumatoid arthritis, juvenile rheumatoid arthritis, idiopathic thrombocytopenic purpura (ITP), hemolytic anemia, multiple sclerosis, thyroiditis and type 1 diabetes mellitus in vaccinated populations were the same as in unvaccinated populations. The usual arguments from the charming anti-vaccine lobby have all been scuppered.

Whenever you see a CDC official interviewed or quoted regarding a vaccine — ANY vaccine — you may be surprised to learn that you’re actually watching an advertisement.

It doesn’t look like an ad. You won’t see pretty models or a clever slogan. And, of course, there are no disclaimers.

Instead, there’s a government official “educating” the unwary on why they should trust the CDC’s judgment and blindly roll up their sleeves for whatever vaccines it endorses.

There’s just one problem. The CDC’s recommendations are driven by sales, not science.

Today, the marketing lesson is on ‘how to sell HPV vaccines to a skeptical crowd’.

The skeptical crowd that thinks 5,400 deaths per million is a more acceptable number than 1? Mathematics my good man!

Because there’s a new version of Gardasil coming down the pike. It’s an even stronger and probably riskier version than the original. And this vaccine, currently called V503, is now being concocted in Merck’s laboratories.

Merck hopes to have V503 on the market ASAP. That’s why the CDC is doing all it can to promote these kinds of vaccines — to keep people from ‘wising up’ to the danger, like Maddie’s mom belatedly did.

Recently, the CDC conducted a study to assess effectiveness of HPV vaccines. The study included subjects vaccinated with Gardasil (Merck’s vaccine) and Cervarix (GlaxoSmithKline’s vaccine).

My! That was awfully good of the CDC to spend OUR tax dollars to help Merck and GSK do the work THEY should be paying for!

And that wasn’t the only gift the CDC gave to the drug giants.

The CDC announced the good news results in a press release with this headline… “New study shows HPV vaccine helping lower HPV infection rates in teen girls.”

Fantastic! Right? The vaccines work! Our girls are safe!

Well…not exactly.

An oncology dietician named Sharlene Bidini analyzed the study. With a sharp eye for detail, she uncovered stunning results. They’re right there for anyone to see. But the CDC clearly does not want to highlight them in its marketing strategy.

For instance, the study examined HPV exams from more than 8,000 women. But some of them were as old as 59! And less than 10 percent (only 740) were actually teens.

Er… Because teenagers very very rarely get Cervical Cancer. For the same reason we don’t test teenagers for Alzheimers or Heart Attacks or Osteoporosis. One is a rare tragedy, the other is a fact of age. And HPV vacuolated cells take time to develop. The point of giving teenagers the vaccine is to catch them before they become sexually active since HPV is spread by sex and poor hygiene. The joke here is sex ed and indeed vaccinations go hand in hand..

There is no point vaccinating after they have a HPV infection. The horse has bolted and has legged it.

Suddenly, this large study looks pretty thin. But it gets even thinner.

Of those 740 teens, only 358 were sexually active. So for 382 teens, the testing was irrelevant. Their likelihood of having HPV was zilch!

You can get HPV from poor hygiene too. Don’t look so smug, how many of you ever touched the seat of your pants? How many touched a door handle? Escalator hand rail? Zilch indeed.

And now here’s the kicker. Among the 358 sexually active teens, just 111 received at least one dose of the three-dose vaccine.

Doctors have given millions of girls these vaccines. And the sample the CDC came up with was barely more than 100? And those didn’t even necessarily go through the whole treatment?

But here’s the real kicker:

Over the study period, occurrence of HPV infection dropped by less than 6 percent among vaccinated teens. In unvaccinated teens, HPV dropped by more than 27 percent.

So maybe that headline should have read: “Unvaccinated girls safer than vaccinated girls.”

But of course, the CDC and its Big Pharma brethren aren’t going to sell any vaccines with THAT headline.

So ask yourself…what would Don Draper do?

Interesting, no study name here.

My response? Facts.

A 56% drop in HPV rates and it would be higher if these buffoons didn’t think major surgery should be a punishment for promiscuity.

So to recap? Not only do the anti-vax fail at the basic mathematics of the issue, but their honesty and integrity is questionable because they routinely misdiagnose cases to support their figures. And this goes without saying that they have absolutely no idea how the actual vaccine works or any of the physiology and pathology behind disease.



  1. says

    I have a mild allergy to the adhesives used on some tapes and bandaids. During my last round of vaccinations, these were apparently what was used as I ended up with a very nasty little rash around the injection site before I even left the building.

    I requested an ointment for the rash.

    Thanks to how things have to be written up, I am now down as one of the people who has had a ‘nasty side effect from a vaccination’ and am used by anti-vaxxers as an example in their argument that ‘statistically vaccines are bad’. I think that alone demonstrates how empty anti-vax logic really is.

    As I’ve stated before, if you have to lie to make your argument, your argument is most likely wrong.

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