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Jan 26 2014

Short Hair Blues

There is an article going about about short hair.

I started going bald young, I don’t know why, the doctors suggested it was due to injuries sustained when younger.

And for a long time it was a terrible thing. I tried everything. Rogaine to everyone’s natural medicine suggestions. Until finally I had to shave my head. I had an interview and let’s just say I covered for my loss of hair with stupid dye jobs.

At the time when I did it, baldness as a male hair style was becoming fashionable and still there were people who would deride my choice of hair. Particularly after moving to India, going bald was pitied.

And for a while I bought into it. Being bald sucked, mainly because women didn’t see it as attractive and because I lacked confidence (which was probably the reason why it was not attractive). I have even had patients who have far more serious conditions than me  pity me when I say that the reason I am bald is not religious but because I lost my hair. It’s just them.

In India though, hair is linked to virility. I guarantee you this, no event is as pleasurable for a man as an indian barber. Imagine a proper haircut for a few dollars (something that would cost you well into the $30 to $40 bracket out in the USA or UK), a massage and a shave with a straight edge razor (both to and against the grain). It is luxury incarnate to experience and cheap as chips.

And such is the pride that many men have with their hair that they often go weekly. Their moustaches and beards are styled with loving care and their hair is centimetre perfect. India is still the land of the old school hairstyle. To lack hair is to be pitied and a sign of losing virility.

But I assumed this was something purely male. I never really thought of it till Hera wanted to get her hair cut and I told her she should try cuttiing it short. A lot of Indians wear their hair incredibly long for cultural reasons and it surprises them how cutting their hair works out and secondly it’s a lot less effort in the morning and I am a pragmatist. And I quite like short hair in the same way that Hera likes baldies.

So I was surprised when she told me that all men like long haired women. I thought it was silly. But then this article came along.

Oh you all know the article. Do I have to link it? Well out of politeness I will. I won’t use the donotlink method, I believe that when criticising even click bait bullshit such as this, the author demands some respect. I don’t appreciate it when people steal from my mouth and I won’t do it to others no matter how vile, vapid or virulent their ideas are. I will warn you what is involved and I do quote their article so you don’t have to go give Return of the King (RoK) money.

If your wealth is burning a hole in your pocket and you feel the unreasonable need to spend, then may I  suggest my two pronged fundraiser? I am raising money for ASTI and new equipment to go hiking. I normally hike on army  surplus but my major cost is a £300 pledge I need to hit before my main fundraiser works. In order to pay it, I would have to cancel my photography project for the next year and dedicate the money saved to that.

It is your choice on which to donate to, you can use my Paypal link down the left for equipment and the £300 pledge (I think I can buy army  surplus boots and gear so should be fine with that. Those are £40 for boots, £30 for a rucksack, £30 for other stuff). I must buy these first because it’s harder to get proper gear in India,

If you wish to donate to Acid Survivor’s Trust instead, check out my  Just Giving page.

But apart from that. On with the show!

No woman in all of human history has ever looked better with short hair than she would with a head full of healthy locks. Despite this irrefutable fact, American women are “chopping it off” in greater numbers every day. This rears its ugly head in an array of ugly permutations, from the boy-like pixie cut to bizarre semi-shaved head topographies. The rationalizations—whether it’s donating their hair to sick kids or the summer weather—are immaterial. The effect, and true reasons, are the same.

Gravity is an irrefutable fact, this is merely an opinion. You do not like short hair. I do. I happen to think hair is “hair” and that whether you wear it long or short, what you are happy with is what you should wear. Tuthmosis just comes off as a gigantic stick in the mud.

Never mind the fact that these cuts have existed for thousands of years and many cultures have utilised them.

And fuck the sick kids, got to look good. Sick kids have all the fun! I chose to shave my head. I cut the keratin extrusions on my scalp for fashionable reasons. Sick kids have even less of a  choice than I do. So you know what? Sick kids need hair. No, the real poison of the PUA/MRA community comes from it’s selfishness.

Remember this is a diatribe that boils down to “Why do women cut their hair, don’t they understand I like long hair? Why can’t they not cater to all of my needs”.

I blame this lamentable trend on a few factors. The most powerful are the disingenuous lies—from both men and women—about how it looks. Women are quick to encourage other women to cut their hair by telling them how “cute” it is. While I’m no scientist, I’m convinced this is some deep, genetic programming at work, one that forces women—who compete with one another on a physical level on a daily basis—to encourage any behavior that might eliminate competitors in the dating pool. Men are no better. The cowardly and deluded among us perpetuate the myth that “some girls can pull it off.” Pulling something off, I often respond, is the equivalent of “passing” a class. Just because you have enough left-over attractiveness to remain bangable after cutting off your hair doesn’t mean you wouldn’t look better with it back on.

This is why when Hera cut her hair short, I bought her a trident and a net for all those physical competitions she has to win.

And you are right, you are no scientist. There is no genetics for “bitchy genes”. So in the words of Tuthmosis, the reason why Hera cut her hair is because “I wish to stop other men from seeing her as attractive”.

This is part of that MRA/PUA idea that if you are simply mean you will get women dancing around to fulfil every need.http://www.theguardian.com/world/2013/nov/15/batkid-san-francisco-charity-make-wish

I once spoke to two girls outside of a restaurant. One had a short, boy-like haircut, while her friend had long, healthy black hair. The short-haired girl spoke in an obvious Latin American accent, while the long-haired friend spoke in a clearly American accent, though she sported facial features of someone from Indian-subcontinent extraction. Before long, our conversation steered to personal matters and, bored with our pedestrian topics, I floated a provocative question. “Why did you cut your hair short?” The Indian girl jumped down my throat before the Latin girl had a chance to respond, though once I settled her down, I managed to get my answer.

I am going to assume that these facial features are a euphemism for “brown”.

Say what you want about Tuthmosis but he is trying to not see colour.

Latin Girl: I used to have long hair, but I just broke up with a boyfriend.

Me: I’m sure it looked better before.

Indian-American Girl: That’s sexist and stupid! It looks cute!

Latin Girl [ignoring her remark]: Wanna see a picture? [shows me her passport]

Me: God, it looks way better. You look like a different person, and way younger.

Indian-American Girl: She looks just as good, dude. Who are you?

Me [to Latin girl]: Let me ask you something: are guys hitting on you less now with the short hair?

Latin Girl: Oof. Absolutely. A lot less.

Me: If you had to put a number on it, what would you say the reduction is?

Latin Girl: At least 90 percent less. That’s partly why I did it. I wanted to be alone for a while after my break up.

Me [to Indian-American girl]: See what happens when theory meets reality?

Another factor is the effect of Hollywood and the celebrity culture on women’s behavior. It’s already well-documented that women have a much-stronger copycat instinct than men. While men—to paraphrase an astute manosphere commentator—seek to stand out from the crowd, women’s aim to stand out in the crowd. Just like women don’t go to the bathroom alone, they don’t go into a stylealone. The plaudits a Miley Cyrus, Rihanna, or Anne Hathaway receive when they cut their hair off—from people who have no business commenting on the attractiveness of women, like gay men—creates a copycat cycle that increases the trend geometrically. Further evidence of this female impulse is on display when you see the same effect at work in a positive ways.

Actually it’s because women are considered attractive in a very narrow band of fashion, body types and looks when compared to men who can get away with pretty much any sort of hairstyle, body shape, hair and even weight. Barry White is still considered sexy as fuck despite being known for being morbidly obese, a weight issue that would have ruled out many women from being “attractive”.

Miiley Cyrus doesn’t look attractive to me because I have spent 5 years in a bubble. I don’t “get” her hairstyle. I am old, deeply out of touch on what’s fashionable and spend my life in old t-shirts and shorts. I understand people find her attractive. Rihanna and Anne Hathaway though are pretty.

And Gay Men can tell women that they are attractive. It’s not like being straight makes you unable to gauge the attractiveness of other men.

Whenever I’m in Argentina, I’m always struck by the rows of girls walking down the street with long flowing hair reaching down near their asses. Hair to the middle of the back is considered “short” there. As an experiment, I remember asking one girl with especially long hair if she’d ever consider cutting it. She answered that she’d “rather die,” and regaled me with a story of her “unfortunate friend” who’d gone into a salon for a clean-up. Instead of the “two centimeters” she’d instructed him to remove, the stylist had cut off double. “Every morning she looks in the mirror and breaks down in tears. This has been going on for 10 days straight.”

Cool story.

I know a young lady who shaved her head to serve her country because “it’s only fucking hair” and it got hot under the helmet. I know a young lady who keeps her hair short because she works as an engineer and “machinery and long hair are a bad mix”. I know one not so young lady who cuts her hair short because she is a surgeon and long hair doesn’t fit under the sterile cap and is messy and hard to clean.

Now I am sure there are shallow people out there.. And in fact reading PUA blogs is like a window into an entirely different species that exists on the most superficial of levels. It’s a bizarre world where people have no thought processes beyond things like this and where all human interaction is superficial. Where your hair means everything to you.

And then I realised there is a reason why hair means everything to some people and that’s because they are told from a young age that hair is important and not having hair is doom incarnate and ugly. I can only speak for men, there is an entire culture of support men give each other for deciding to not fall for the party line that hair maketh the man and shave their heads.

I guess it’s the same for women. To do something as bold as shaving one’s head or getting a short cut would be a rejection of the entire dialogue and that includes the Tuthmosis of the world by doing something different. By getting a haircut that you like rather than something set aside for you by the dictate of society.

The truth of the matter is that long hair’s almost universally attractive to men, when they’re actually speaking honestly (without trying to appease women in the room). Furthermore, it’s a symbol of youth, femininity, and health. Why can’t old women grow long hair? Because it’s an ephemeral trait of your fertile years. Women instinctively know this, which is why every American girl who cuts, andkeeps, her hair short often does it for ulterior reasons. Short hair is a political statement. And, invariably, a girl who has gone through with a short cut—and is pleased with the changes in her reception—is damaged in some significant way. Short hair is a near-guarantee that a girl will be more abrasive, more masculine, and more deranged.

I would respond to this but the point I want to make is that “old women can grow hair too”.

Short hair can be a political statement, or you can just like short hair.

And I am sure most women would come off as abrasive, angry and “deranged” if you insult their damn hair and expect them to be happy about it. If you came up to me in the street and declared my buzzcut to be terrilble and that I should look like Johnny Depp and that I am shaving my head in order to show my support for a Tibetan Theocracy then I too will be abrasive.

I’d developed that belief on years of platonic interactions alone. The bitchiest work colleagues, the most difficult cashier, the most confrontational, aggressive cunts in bars have all shared one trait—short-ass hair. But it wasn’t until I decided to make exceptions to my no-dating-short-haired-girlsrule that I proved this beyond any doubt. The first pixie-cut girl I went out with—who was otherwise attractive—harbored twisted rape fantasies that actually concerned me that I was being entrapped. She cavalierly talked about filthy sex, throwing around the word “pussy” and “cock” even when our clothes were on. When—during a rather vanilla conversation about men and women—I made some tame remarks about what men find attractive in women, she broke down into inconsolable bawling and, literally, ran out of the bar we were in. It made about as much sense as crying if I’d just told you tomorrow was Saturday.

Judging from your prior work, I highly doubt what you said was so tame.

And nothing wrong with rape fantasies mate as long as they are fantasies. I mean people have school girl fantasies and dress up as hot school girls. Hell in the UK we have a specific event dedicated to everyone dressing up in school uniforms and going clubbing.

Unless High School Disco nights are out of fashion. It just means dressing up like you were in school and having fun, not actually seducing kids in school. If you cannot differentiate between the sex roleplay and the real thing you have bigger problems than short hair. And just because you don’t like something doesn’t mean it’s bad.

Another short-haired girl once came over to my house, texted with one hand, while she jerked me off with the other. The person on the other side of the iPhone, I quickly learned, was her until-then secret “boyfriend.” Still another girl, who had long hair while we were hanging out—but has since sheared it into an unflattering soccer-mom configuration—lived with a (legitimate) prostitute, was emotionless during sex unless I was super-aggressive, and used racial slurs to refer to people as if that was the formal term for them. On the outside, she was a college student, from a well-to-do family, who worked with children part-time.

0/10 points for choice of bloke, 8/10 for multi-tasking. I don’t think her short hair made her cheat on you dude. I think it may have had other reasons. Such as you insisting she do something about your erection when she was clearly not interested. I have never had anyone do anything sexual with me while trying to multi-task. I find that it’s a good way to hurt yourself or screw up multi-tasking.

Yes mate, leaving you was so devastating she cut her hair, hung out with prostitutes (legit ones only, illegitimate prostitutes get no love) and lies there during sex because you ruined her for other men. Go pat yourself on the back.

My word! I was unaware that cutting your hair leads to racism… It explains my sudden urges to do something stereotypical of racist organisations of note such as

1. Invade Poland

2. Burn a Cross

3. Goose Step

Not only is short-hair unattractive, it’s one of the biggest signals a man can get that a woman is damaged beyond repair. There’s no such thing as “pulling it off.”

Ah yes.

If the PUA method doesn’t work, the woman is broken. That’s why the method didn’t work.

Too tall, short, pretty, ugly, fat, thin, smart stupid. You name your reason as to why your trick doesn’t work. It’s why the PUA and MRA never realise that “sometimes it’s not everyone else but you”.

The MRA and PUA have one major thing in common. An abject lack of self awareness.

19 comments

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  1. 1
    rq

    So…. short hair doesn’t grow out again? Which is kind of the conclusion I reached with the implication that short-haired women are “damaged beyond repair”.
    Also, as I read this piece, my already determined and strong desire to cut all or most of my (long) hair off right this second increased exponentially, if it will make me less attractive to people like Tuthmosis.

  2. 2
    Holms

    Took a quick tour of that site and facepalmed at every article I skimmed. This guy takes obnoxious wankery and elevates it almost to a form of art.

  3. 3
    Beatrice, an amateur cynic looking for a happy thought

    I’m just surprised he never insinuated that women with short hair were lesbians.

    I’ve been keeping my hair short for a couple of years now, and the kind of comments I get are:
    a) this is evidence I’m lesbian. Especially taking into account owning a leather jacket.
    short hair + leather jacket and I’m just missing a motorcycle to perfectly fit some butch lesbian stereotype, apparently.
    b) young women aren’t supposed to wear their hair short, that’s for old women (virility wasn’t mentioned, but this clearly goes into the same category)
    c) “Oh, you have boy hair”

    Cutting my hair wasn’t a political decision, it was a practical one. I don’t care enough to spend time conditioning my hair, brushing it out or drying it for an hour, so it only made sense to cut the inconvenience short.
    But every time I get a negative comment regarding my femininity or sexuality as related to my hair, the more convinced I am in my decision to keep it short. Fuck them.

  4. 4
    Angeles

    I got this site from my friend who told me regarding this web page and at the moment
    this time I am browsing this site and reading very informative content here.

  5. 5
    Axxyaan

    I remember going bald, rather young. It didn’t bother me much but getting to listen to all the people who just assumed it would bother me and who came with all kind of advise did become rather tiresome. Of course when I reacted a bit irritated after for the upteemth time someone gave me unsollicited advise on how to “treat” my baldness, they saw this irritation as a confirmation that my baldness was frustrating me.

  6. 6
    bronwyncaveney

    Short hair/no hair is awesome. and Beatrice, so are leather jackets. The motorcycle is the icing on the cake. I love mine, and highly recommend them. This guy who says otherwise is missing out.

  7. 7
    Al Dente

    I not only went bald at a young age, my hair started going grey when I was in my 20s. Now I have a fringe of hair around my head and it’s pure white. I also have a white beard. I tell people I didn’t go bald, my hair migrated to the bottom of my head.

  8. 8
    machintelligence

    From an old set of Burma Shave signs (a now mostly forgotten brand of shaving cream, which advertised on small, sequentially placed road signs).
    The farmer who
    was bald on top
    sure wished he could
    rotate the crop
    He needed
    Burma Shave

  9. 9
    otranreg

    Is it just me, or does it look like all the anecdotes in the article were freshly pulled from deep inside the author’s arse?

  10. 10
    badgersdaughter

    I’m nearing 50 and running into people occasionally who ask me when I am considering cutting off the long hair that nearly reaches my waist. Not if,when. The nicest thing I say is, “when I grow up”. The best thing I’ve said is “when you consider cutting off your cock”.

  11. 11
    badgersdaughter

    italics fail, probably sexism fail as well (I just can’t resist teasing PUAs about their cocks, sorry)

  12. 12
    Codi Johnson

    The only positive thing about the referenced article that I saw was that the people commenting spent so much time insulting each other—generally by using a variety of terms to call each other gay—that they probably have very little time to troll on decent websites.

  13. 13
    Randomfactor

    I personally like long hair on women. But I can see the attraction of cutting it off short if it repels the kind of asshole who wrote the piece you quoted.

    I, too, didn’t actually go bald. My scalp simply experienced the bodily equivalent of continental drift. The part is now the ocean, except for a few very scattered archipelagos.

  14. 14
    gwen

    I tell men who want me to grow my hair long, to grow their own if they want long hair. It is my hair on my head, and I can do what I want with it. I had a boss who proudly wore her hair waist length until she took a self defense class. The instructor showed her how an attacker could grab her by her long hair. She cut it off that day and never looked back.

  15. 15
    MadHatter

    Ah the stupid. From my teens through until about 30 I used to grow my hair out and then cut it spiky short every couple of years. How much I got hit on didn’t change and it wouldn’t have made a difference to me if it did. I also used to tell men who told me they liked it better long that they were welcome to grow their own. It fit so much better under riding helmets, and was much more comfortable in the summer! Anecdotally, I have had as many men like my hair short as they did when it was long.

    It’s longer now just because it’s hard to find a stylist and expensive to get it cut as often as I needed to for a nice short cut.

    Many of my male friends and boyfriends started going bald young (early 20′s) and all of them looked great when they started shaving it. My current boyfriend is at the usual age for hair loss and just jokes that it migrated everywhere else. In conversations they seemed to get a lot less crap about going bald than I did about cutting mine off.

  16. 16
    angharad

    I have very long hair – mid thigh length. l don’t find the maintenance of it particularly onerous, but I almost always wear it tied up in some way. Wearing my hair loose I have gotten it caught in car doors, stuck on wet paint, nearly plugged myself into an electrical outlet, and once lay down on it in such a way as to be unable to get up. In other words it renders me into a purely decorative object. I can sit there and do nothing while you admire my amazing hair, or I can tie it back and get on with stuff.

  17. 17
    Dave, ex-Kwisatz Haderach

    My hair has been a uniform 1/8 – 1/4 inch my entire life. Its simple, easy to care for, I can cut it myself in 10mins or less (strangers touching my head is not an option), and (recently) conceals my growing bald spot. Mostly I think hair is a nuisance, and I don’t know why anyone would want to deal with a huge mass of hair. I’ve dated women with hair lengths ranging from down to the knees to shorter than mine. Whatever my preference may be, it doesn’t matter because its their choice not mine. Rock the hairstyle you want to wear. To hell with assholes who want to dictate what is and isn’t sexy.

  18. 18
    DsylexicHippo

    The short-haired girl spoke in an obvious Latin American accent, while the long-haired friend spoke in a clearly American accent, though she sported facial features of someone from Indian-subcontinent extraction.

    What? You mean the bushy stash on the upper lip?

    Jokes aside, I like short hair on women. A tad north of the upper lip though.

  19. 19
    octopod

    I feel like a bit of a hypocrite commenting on this, because while I generally keep my own hair pretty short (I tell the barber to try for somewhere between Carl Sagan and Rachel Maddow), and of course support anyone doing whatever the hell they want with their own follicular products, so long as I can’t smell it from the other end of the bus, I am hugely partial to long hair on guys.

    Not that I think all men should have long hair; just that doing so makes almost any man vastly more attractive, regardless of hair texture and baldingness. So, in a way, I can see where this guy is coming from. Yes, I know; it’s a bit embarrassing.

    To the above commenter, though, your preference for a lack of upper lip fuzz on women is not nearly as universal as you may suppose — I have heard a guy describe a girl quite earnestly as having “a cute little moustache”. (And then there’s the historical Central Asian feminine beauty ideal that included a unibrow….but I begin to digress.)

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