It’s Not Real

Sometimes you come across something so spectacularly daft from a religious person that you cannot believe if it’s a real argument or a joke.

Magic is the usage of science to fool the eye into thinking the impossible has occurred.

You cannot saw a real lady in half. You cannot catch bullets with your teeth.

But no one’s told Dan Delzell this.

I had never heard of the magician, Dynamo, until I read about how he floated alongside a double-decker bus in London recently. I watched the video. Personally, I think it was legit. I believe this was a paranormal event and an authentic example of levitation. But it’s not like this sort of thing is completely unheard of today.

At it’s simplest it’s an iron bar made too look like a hand holding him in a harness.

Or some other trick that I am not privy to. Just because it’s a cool trick doesn’t mean it’s magic.

Whether the levitation is experienced by young girls playing a dangerous occult “game” at a slumber party, (“Light as a feather, Stiff as a board”) or by street magicians as shown on YouTube videos, paranormal things happen when people engage in practices that are rooted in sorcery, magic and witchcraft. Many magicians and other occultists have experienced levitation and various forms of supernatural power. These sorcerers typically cast spells or perform other rituals in an attempt to conjure the power to accomplish these feats. It is becoming more and more commonplace to see such expressions of magical performance.

I… can’t say anything to make fun of this any more. This is so stupid that I cannot make fun of it because it does an admirable job on it’s own.

Light as a feather, stiff as a board is just kids picking someone up.

Ouija boards only work in English on TV for some strange reason. What? Chinese people can’t be ghosts?

What most of these magicians do not realize, however, is that the power to do such things only appears to be under their control. These magical performers are actually being duped by beings with superior intelligence to their own. Just as some magicians engage in illusion, so do the spirits which seduce magicians to go deeper and deeper into their craft. It is incredibly enticing, especially when the performers start to get high on the attention it brings them. While the spellbinding feats such as levitation are very often real, these “abilities” are not under the ultimate control and power of the magician.

Seriously? There is a word for such a person.


Magicians are among the greatest sceptics of us all because their art is usage of science and sleight of hand to create the illusion that they are breaking the known laws of existence. They aren’t doing impossible things. Merely “LOOKING” like they are doing that..

All the control over these supernatural occurrences belongs to the spirits which orchestrate this “power seduction.” These evil spirits seek to have total dominion over their host, and so they willfully perform supernatural acts when their host jumps through certain hoops and says certain “magical” words. It is all a con, and the victims are the hosts (magicians) and those who choose to follow the example of the sorcerers and take up the craft themselves in the seductive pursuit of power.

The mythos  of magicians vary. There are the “friendly “magicians such as Paul Daniels who were all about personality. Their tricks may have been routine but they won their audiences over by being “fun” and accessible.

There are the showmen like David Copperfield or the “Vegas Stage Show”

There are the skeptical ones who thrive on people trying to break their fiendish illusions like Penn and Teller.

There are sleight of handers and card specialists who’s entire ability is down to “very very clever hands”.

Then there are the new street magicians who stepped out of the traditional trappings and just do their tricks without distance.

The ability to fake levitate is not a seductive pursuit of power as much as a long  thought out process by which science is used to fool the onlooker into thinking it’s “magic”.

Does this mean that everyone who is exposed to Harry Potter is going to come under the power of the devil? Of course not. But it does mean that the real spirits which are opposed to God will meet you right where you are at if you are willing to engage them for a little “power encounter” in the name of “magic.” They will move a physical object for you, or give you some revelation of knowledge that you could not otherwise have known. They will draw you in one step at a time, and all the while you mistakenly assume that you and your “unique and special abilities” are responsible for these paranormal results. Yeah right. Nothing could be further from the truth. But that is certainly the illusion which is cast by the evil spirits in order to snag unsuspecting recruits who long to be powerful wizards. At that point, the trap has been successfully laid and the bait is wickedly enticing to those with visions of grandeur. After all, these new recruits are beginning to perceive themselves as having “a special calling to the craft.”

Ironically many of the themes of Harry Potter are very “Christian”. For all the “demon bashing” that fundies do when it comes to Harry Potter we forget that the entire series has a theme of sacrifice. From Lily and James to protect their son, to Sirius to protect his new godson, to Reginald Black to Dumbledore to the Weasleys to Malfoy’s mother to finally Harry and Snape.

The theme of sacrifice for Harry to save his friends has a lot of parallels with the story and “moral” that Christians try to push with Jesus. And yes it’s kind of puzzling that wizards use Bible quotes on their graves (Because Jesus’s miracles are a lot less impressive when you consider all Wizards can do that.

It’s not because the book is religious though. It’s because most western audiences understand the emblemology of sacrifice with regards to Jesus and so we identify with similar behaviour.

And I am afraid if these individuals could do magic we would have found a way to turn them into weapons. The happy truth of the matter is it’s all smoke and mirrors.

There is actually an infamous angelic being who was the first one to have visions of grandeur which were terribly misplaced. It didn’t turn out too well for him. (See what Jesus said about him in Luke 10:18) And it’s only going to get far worse. (See Revelation 20:10 for a glimpse behind the curtain.) His minions know quite well how to entice wannabe bigwigs with that particular desire because their master fell from heaven as a result of the same ungodly passion. These fallen angels are experts at spotting that weakness in someone, and they jump on it with a vengeance once they get a whiff of your susceptibility in that area, and your “usability” in their larger scheme. You are now the puppet they begin training to entice other unsuspecting souls into the realm of the occult, whether that is your personal agenda or not. It doesn’t matter. That is what they will use you for if you fall for the illusion and become seduced by the perceived payoff at the end of the rainbow. 

Now  here is the question. What if the magician’s hypothetical magic came from a divine source?

All I have to say is this.

The irony is that the people who don’t believe in a god would probably  be the closest to a god if one existed.

The perceived pay off? Really?

Thankfully, there is a way out of this addiction if you are one of those who has become snagged in their cunning web of witchcraft and sorcery. Do you want to get free from this “puppet life” and magical obsession? Here is something any witch or magician should seriously consider. Try saying these words sincerely from your heart, if you dare:

Okay. How about this. Any people who do magic tricks in the audience?

“In the name of Jesus, I renounce any act of darkness over my life. I pray that the blood of Jesus will cover my soul and my sins. I renounce any spells over me and I cast them away in Jesus’ name. I call upon Christ and Him alone to save my soul and set me free from any addiction to magic. Free me Lord, in my mind, and in my body. Break the stronghold in my life Lord Jesus. Make me new through the blood of the Lamb. And burn away through the blood of Jesus any evil spirits that are around my life. I believe you died and rose again from the grave Lord Jesus. Forgive me for loving magic rather than worshipping you, my Creator and Redeemer. I renounce levitation, as well as any pursuit of magical power, and I look forward to ascending to heaven one day by your power Almighty God. I now know that I have no power in and of myself. You Lord Jesus are now my Defender and my Savior. You are my power. Set me free to love you rather than loving magic and spiritual darkness. Fill my soul with the power of the Holy Spirit. Forgive all my sins and wash them away as far as the east is from the west. I need You Lord, today and forever. Thank you for loving me, and for dying on the cross and rising again for my eternal salvation. In Jesus’ name. Amen.”

Say these words and see if you become terrible at it.

It will take the grace of God and courage from the Holy Spirit for you to pray those words sincerely, but I challenge you to do so if you believe that Jesus is the Victor, and Satan is the loser. In fact, pray it everyday for a week. See how God’s power works for a change.

You mean the guy who died to some two by fours and ironically for a carpenter died by joinery is somehow better than the guy who gave humanity it’s most powerful tool?

There are many Indians who live in the rural villages who lack the education needed to understand magic tricks. There are unscrupulous holy men who do these to con them into believing that they are truly “sacred” and magical. There are also atheists and sceptics in India who get together and go and show the villagers how to do these “tricks” to take the power away from con men.

What excuses does Dan have?

And then begin to read the Bible rather than books about magic. God’s Word will fill your soul with things you could never receive from the dark side. You will experience contentment like never before if you use the discipline you have used in the past, but now, you apply it to prayer, Scripture reading, and sharing the love of Jesus and His words with others. These godly power encounters are on a much higher level than magic. Only a disciplined mind can walk on this narrow path, but boy is it ever worth it. Do you think you can be disciplined enough through God’s grace to handle this new challenge in your life? It will be like nothing you have ever encountered I assure you.

Yes, read the Bible where people get turned into pillars of salt and incest has no deleterious effects. Because magic is totally real.

God doesn’t need magic. And besides, it is below Him. He is God. He can do anything, anytime, anywhere. It’s time for you to get excited about that fact, rather than wasting your life on the empty pursuit of magical spells, rituals, and occultic observances. That dangerous power seduction will never give you the ability to ascend to heaven one day, but only the eventual burden to descend into hell.

Which by definition is “Magic”.

And if he could do that then he is not a good god. He is a god who watches children die in agony.

I had a case yesterday. Mass Abdomen. Turns out it was carcinoma of the stomach. While palpating this woman I found a growth on her back. A bone secondary. AKA Metastasis. No prayer will save her. Chemo will delay the process but she is dying (well dying faster than the rest of us).

Today I had a patient with breast cancer with bone pain. Another indicator. Also poor prognosis.

A kind and loving god would save them, humans will try to save them because they are good and they agree that no one should suffer.

I had an auto driver beg me to cure his son. They said he was possessed by  demons. He didn’t understand why his son had seizures and then saw on TV a character with epilepsy get cured by a “pill”. So he wanted that last throw of a dice. To him if the gods have failed then what use is a man?

Sodium Valproate. Stops seizures. His son can live  a normal life. He just cannot work in places with flashing lights. He will never be a DJ or a copper.

It’s not witch craft, it is something you don’t understand.

Jesus is life. Jesus is freedom. Jesus is power. And all who belong to Christ will ascend to heaven with Him. Check out what God says on this matter: “For the Lord Himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever. Therefore encourage each other with these words.” (1 Thess. 4:16-18)

Jesus apparently made you stupid.

This is why, my friend, levitation is so lame when compared to what God can do for you. Would you like to ascend with Christ one day, or are you too addicted to what those deceptive spirits are doing to make you feel like a successful sorcerer? It’s a con game. Don’t get conned by sinister spirits. Instead, get saved through faith in the blood of Jesus. And then start telling others about His power. Also, you will want to be sure to get actively involved in a Christian church where the Bible is taught in a spirit of love and grace. How else do you think the spiritual power is going to remain at a high level in your soul and in your new life of discipleship?

Ascend With Christ sounds like a work out video. Maybe you do Star of David Jumps and the Cross Trainer is something entirely different. That being said? Seen the statues of Jesus? That man was pretty ripped.

It turns out much better when you trust in Jesus than when you live life obsessed with magic. So don’t fall for the illusion. Don’t be seduced by the power, even though the power is very real and alluring. If those evil spirits could levitate your soul to heaven for eternity, they would be worshipping the Creator rather than tempting people to dabble with the counterfeit practices of the occult.

The power to stick to buses on the outside? It’s less powerful than you think about it. I mean to be fair that just means a good chance you are going to be struck by a bus coming the other way or into a lamp post or spend an entire journey eating bugs. Truth be told? That’s a stupid power, it’s nicer to sit inside the bus.

After all? The engine is powered by burning demons!

Why do you think we measure it in horsepower? These are Stygian Horses.

So would you rather float next to a big bus for a few minutes, or live in paradise forever? Both of them require supernatural power. But only one of them will bring perfect contentment to your soul and rapturous joy to your entire being throughout eternity. Hmm. Let’s see. That’s a tough one. Temporary bus floater, or eternal resident of heaven? Is this a trick question?

I would rather be smart enough to recognise that there is no magic involved in floating next to a bus. Merely physics.

I am beginning to sense the truth in the statement that ignorance is bliss. This man is clearly fucking orgasmic.


  1. badgersdaughter says

    I’m a born-again Christian (well, ex-Christian). Ironically, I’m the lone atheist and skeptic in my Tarot club. I got into Tarot in the first place as psychological exploration, and because I’m fascinated with the deep meaning in pictures, and because I am acquisitive and collect decks.

    I am considered an excellent Tarot reader, despite the fact that I loudly disclaim any “psychic power” and have been known to tear a card in half to dramatically prove that I don’t consider the cards themselves to have any supernatural power, either. Half the group thinks I am putting on a big act to get attention, and the other half believes me but thinks I just don’t realize I am “highly gifted”.

    There’s just no convincing some people that there’s a perfectly good natural-world reason for the things that confuse and excite them, and that you’re engaged in trying to figure out what it is.

  2. Francisco Bacopa says

    This dude actually thinks that “Light as a feather, stiff as a board” is accessing occult power? Everyone knows that index fingers are really strong. If you could just coordinate everyones actions, perhaps by doing some silly chant, four girls could easily lift another girl without feeling they were making any effort at all. Maybe it’s the chant he objects to. It usually involves the enacting the death of the person being lifted. Maybe it’s that girls do it, and they’re icky, so it must be demonic.

    Using chants and rituals to coordinate human muscular effort was much more common before the age of machinery. Stonehenge and the Moai of Easter Island were chanted into place. I like to think of “Light as a feather…” as a ritual that preserves a type of technology that has almost been lost in the developed world.

  3. says

    This is one of the few times I’m happy to have read internet comments. Even most of the Christians who have posted can’t believe the guy is that oblivious.

  4. says

    I… can’t say anything to make fun of this any more. This is so stupid that I cannot make fun of it because it does an admirable job on it’s own.

    This must be the reductio ad absurdum of Poe’s Law.

  5. garnetstar says

    Francisco @2 is correct. Girls used to do this party trick in the 18th century, and even then skeptics had figured out that any kind of chant that allows coordinated lifting, along with distribution of the weight by correct placement of the index fingers, was the solution.

    I really, really hope that this guy never sees David Blaine’s demonstration of catching a bullet in his teeth. Quite Satanic.

  6. Psychopomp Gecko says

    Careful, composer99. If you say reductio ad absurdum, Dan Delzell will think you’re casting a magic spell. oooOOOoooOOOh!

    I guess this demonstrates how easy this particular Christian is to trick. Most people just won’t know how a trick is done. This guy actually thinks it’s magic, which is usually a belief outgrown at about, what, 10?

  7. bahrfeldt says

    They have to have their ready-to-be-fleeced flock totally convinced that both they and the bad guys have super duper powers, in order to maintain the steady flow of cash (and whatever else they can steal). Yin and Yang, Ahriman and Shaitan, it has been an evenly balanced contest for the hearts and minds and wallets from time immemorial between the one true, omnipotent, god and its false, inferior opponent. Checks, folding money and credit cards cheerfully accepted, give till it hurts.

  8. Tsu Dho Nimh says

    I mean to be fair that just means a good chance you are going to be struck by a bus coming the other way or into a lamp post or spend an entire journey eating bugs.

    Dammit, you owe me a new keyboard!

  9. Acolyte of Sagan says

    Ascend With Christ sounds like a work out video. Maybe you do Star of David Jumps and the Cross Trainer is something entirely different

    As a big fan of clever, subtle humour I salute you, Avi :-)

  10. Seeker says

    I can’t believe there are people *still* obsessing over Harry Potter for the series’ supposed “witchcraft”.

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