Pornography and You

Ah pornography! It’s hard to discuss pornography without looking like a gigantic pervert or a frothing at the mouth lunatic.

So you can rest assured with this admission. I watch pornography. I think that it is a natural part of life and it is healthy if seen in the right context. Yes I understand that most pornography caters to a male power fantasy rather than reality and yes I can tell the difference between reality and fantasy like most sane people all over the world.

Yes, the mere admission that I watch pornography will probably have a lot of people glance disgustingly at my hands but here is the thing. Many people do watch porn, even if they don’t admit it. We are awfully coy about it. Watching porn is only a perversion because we are being coy rather than because we are being sensible. 

But some people think otherwise, providing a list pointing out all that is wrong with me. Not only am I doomed to hairy palms and blindness but also to eternal damnation.

Good madam! Your burkha
has shrunk! As have my trousers!

It’s enough to put one of one’s stroke.

1)  Pornography feeds lust of the eyes and lust of the flesh, which are never satisfied.  It leaves the viewer craving more and more in order to achieve the same “sexual high.”  It easily enslaves people to their own cravings and opens the door to other forms of evil, like anger, abuse, violence, hatred, lying, envy, compulsiveness and selfishness.   The power behind porn is revealed when the porn addict tries to stop their habit – it is virtually impossible without help. 

Pornography does feed the lust of the eyes and body, the very point of pornography is to achieve an orgasm and masturbation. Yes, yes, it’s really icky and really gross but we are living beings and we do reproduce by firing body fluids into each other. Most of us are here due to the exchange of body fluids. It’s fun, it’s why people have sex. If sex was terrible we wouldn’t have so much of it.

Pornography as a thing can only be blamed for two things. Unreasonable expectations and a bit of a mess. It’s not responsible for anger, abuse, violence, envy and selfishness. The lying is due to social acceptance. If you live in a place where porn is normal then “are you watching porn” will be responded with “yes” rather than “don’t come in! I am working on a project!”

I like sex, I just am not having any at this point. I haven’t had any for nearly 3 years, I have not many other options bar pornography. Many people are in this state, not everyone is having sex at this point. Some of us cannot and porn is a healthy way of releasing that stress. I don’t have to watch pornography everyday and neither do most people, but some people do get addicted. Some people get addicted to Jesus but you don’t see us demeaning them either. 

I have been a really,
Really, REALLY Bad girl!

2)  Pornography sexualizes the viewer’s mindset.   It warps and perverts their perspective such that sex is unnaturally elevated in their thoughts.   Porn’s images are stamped into viewer’s  brain with the aid of hormones released during sexual arousal.  Even if a person decides to stop looking at porn, the past images can remain for years or even a lifetime.

Only temporarily and yes, for the time period of viewing porn your perspective is warped and that sex is on your mind. It’s called concentration. In the same way that you concentrate on a movie or a book, you concentrate on porn.

And yes you can remember porn, in the same way you can remember a bible verse or a nice cake. And the biological basis of pornography indicates that it’s natural to watch porn. Think of it this way, if God made you then why do you get pleasure from looking at naked people and sex? Could it be that deriving pleasure from sex is a natural thing?

3)  Pornography promotes destructive practices and can lead to progressive addiction.  For example, porn sites routinely link viewers to depictions of every type of sexual perversion imaginable, such as child porn, homosexuality, bestiality, necrophilia (sexual interest in corpses), masochism (pleasure from abuse or suffering), rape and sadism (gratification from inflicting physical or mental pain on others).  The viewer’s exposure to such themes naturally increases the likelihood that they may attempt to act out what they’ve viewed.  This can lead to sexual crimes, a la the late Ted Bundy and Gary Ridgway (The Green River Killer).

Strange. The ones I go on just seem to have straight/gay/trans pornography. Maybe S&M but that’s not my cup of tea but that too is natural but now is neither the time and place to show off my understanding of S&M theory.

Most of those things are illegal. Sex with a minor is punishable by super jail time, bestiality is animal abuse, necrophilia is just unhygienic and rape is really illegal.

The idea that mere exposure to pornography will cause you to become a murderer is faulty. By that logic being american may turn you into a killer (Both are American). Most serial killers come from traumatic childhoods which cause them to turn into serial killers. One can point out that Ted Bundy was pathologically abused as a child by a heavily religious step father and his father’s abusive nature to women could have imprinted on Bundy. Because I don’t feel like raping and killing anyone right now and really haven’t ever felt like doing so. Not even when watching pornography.

4)  Pornography intensifies an individual’s drive to serve oneself, rather than serve others.  For example, masturbation, which typically accompanies looking at pornography reinforces a self-centered sexual orientation (i.e. lust), which can detract from a person’s ability to give and receive love.

What are you? A virgin? Masturbation! Wanking! A handy shandy! Playing with your Self! Spanking the Monkey! Bashing the Bishop!

Yes it is self gratification and it is generally done when “you are alone” rather than when you are with someone else. And have you ever considered that women may like porn too and that porn as part of a the act of having sex can be a healthy thing? It’s not just men who watch porn.

Ted! Stop looking at porn!
There are patients!

5)  Pornography addiction can lead to debt.  The convenience of credit card transactions on the internet encourages covert spending without limit.  Additionally, pornographers flood common internet areas with enticing banner ads (“teasers”) and spam email, which bait potential viewers with free porn.  Once lured by the free porn to the site, the viewers must then pay to see more.   Porn can also cause huge financial losses for employers with employees who waste company time searching for porn, downloading, viewing and covering their tracks on company computers.   Employees who get caught accessing porn and are subsequently get fired will experience potentially significant losses, most likely leading to debt.  

Read My Lips. There is free porn out there. There is a LOT of free porn out there. You would have to be stupid to pay for it when it is so free. And how is it causing huge financial losses unless you are actually not working to surf and masturbate at work? And you have to be really simple to spend money covering your tracks like that. If you aren’t allowed to use your company computer for porn then don’t, buy your own personal device. There are cheap models out there.

6)  By viewing and/or purchasing porn, viewers are supporting the porn industry and facilitating its growth.  By viewing porn, the viewer is also contributing to the sexual exploitation of whoever or whatever is in the images he or she is viewing.

Whatever? Again I must ask why do all anti-porn people end up stating that they are familiar with porn where the object of affections could only be described by the term “whatever”. In context, the person being exploited is the viewer. See the modern porn industry has changed a lot, digital distribution has placed a lot of power in the hands of the actors rather than the people trying to exploit them. There are a lot of people who do pornography for different reasons. Some actually do like the work. It is basically a fantasy world filled with beautiful women and rather ugly men.

See the entire point of pornography was to provide a fantasy where the man could be replaced in the scene by you. Nowadays with the rise of “feminism” in porn you do see a lot more sex positive scenes where both the men and women are attractive and the context is one of love more so than dominance.

Women masturbate!
This is an outrage!!!

7)  Looking at porn can damage the viewer’s family relationships, not to mention increasing the chance of his or her spouse and children finding the material.  Porn may also inspire the viewer to explore incest, which is a common porn theme.  Other things porn may inspire in the viewer (which could in turn affect the family) include sexual frustration, lying, abuse, affairs, debt, violent behavior and irrational thinking.

Most of the women I date know I watch porn. Hint, most of the women you see probably like masturbation too and have their own “man candy” to oggle over. It’s not unhealthy to find things sexually attractive no matter what a really old book says. And one can equally state that the bible is more accepting of Incest than Pornography is.

No what I find more amusing is the attitude of most religious people in thinking that violence is more acceptable than sex. A gun is more destructive than all the legit porn in the world yet we throw a hissy fit over pornography while leaving guns lying around night stands. We must have our priorities seriously screwed up when we as a people glorify sex (Be it Cheerleaders or our Page 3 girls or our Bollywood heroines) but heaven forbid someone actually enjoy it. Well sexual frustration sells, and there is no place more frustrated than India where sex isn’t spoken of openly resulting in a generation of children who have no clue and don’t know what to do when confronted with images such as a gyrating heroine flashing come to bed eyes. It’s confusing enough when you know what to do, let alone when there is no one to give you any advice apart from a bunch of people who are in the same boat as you or worse, have never had any experience of the same problem.

Cards, Tokens and Glass bottles are also the cause
of my addiction!

8) Looking at porn at work could damage the viewer’s reputation, decrease his or her  productivity and lead to job loss.  It could also inspire unhealthy and/or inappropriate relationships with co-workers.

Who here looks at porn at work? That seems to be a very stupid thing to do. If you cannot keep it in your pants for 12 or so hours then you have a problem and porn isn’t it.

9)  Looking at porn can damage the viewer’s current or future marriage sex life.  Porn viewers may find that it’s difficult to enjoy true intimacy with their spouse when they’re fantasizing about somebody else!  Additionally, porn builds an unrealistic perception of sexual relations.  Porn sex is a portrayal or an act made for the viewer’s enjoyment.  It takes what God intended as a private expression of love between a husband and wife and prostitutes it for entertainment.  When a person has been looking at sexual pictures of other people for entertainment, he or she will have a downgraded value of sex.  This in turn will detract from  their appreciation and value of sex with their spouse.

Sure, or it can make it better. Unrealistic? Maybe you just aren’t that good at it. Sex is pretty awesome really and it’s actually hard to downgrade it if you enjoy it. It’s not being downgraded, its just that many people have completely silly expectations about it.

13)  Looking at porn helps you start to believe the lies it promotes.  Example lies include:

  • Sexual freedom = happiness
  • Perverted sex (homosexual sex, incest, BDSM, etc) is more enjoyable than “normal” heterosexual sex
  • There are no consequences to sexual promiscuity
  • Sexual expression is a right, not a God-given or God-defined gift
  • You can live a healthy life with the porn images floating around in your mind
  • Porn doesn’t harm anyone
  • Sex is something to be done primarily for self gratification
  • The porn stars are the happiest people on earth
  • Adults can view porn without any lasting side effects
  • Porn will help your sex life
  • Porn is just a harmless thing that everybody looks at

These are just a series of strawmen being thrown up to confuddle and bemuse people who are torn between pornography and your nonsense. Sexual freedom is just freedom to be free and to see sex as pleasure rather than a horrible business of duty. The sexual revolution was the idea that sex can be fun rather than just for procreation.

Homsexuality doesn’t matter if it’s a choice or not. If you don’t like Gay Sex then you don’t have Gay Sex. It’s the same with BDSM. One of the first rules of BDSM is that the people involved want to be involved. The actual control of BDSM lies in the masochist not the sadist (The Safety Word).

No one says porn stars are the happiest people on earth, they are just people. The people like you make them unhappy. The corrrect response to “I am a porn star” is “really? That’s pretty interesting” not to foam at the mouth and declare them as sinners and then harass them.

Ultimately, the people are trying to portray any usage of porn as a problem. Not just the addicts but the people who use it in the context of normalcy. By their definition even once is enough to damn you to a life of depraved lust like Gollum only the ring is more “internet pornography and wanking” than a magical object that will get you what you want.  

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