Mock the Movie: Pommeled Edition

Stephanie Zvan

This Wednesday, July 17, we’re…yeah, I don’t really know what we think we’re doing watching Gymkata. All I can really tell you is that it took some work to convince us that this movie wasn’t a self-parody and, thus, nearly impossible to mock.

You can see this movie on YouTube for free.

Two weeks after that, on July 31, comes Total Recall, the original unoriginal adaptation of Philip K. Dick’s story of ideas into a story of whiz bang (bang, bang, bang…).

This is available on Netflix.

Then? Oh, then it’s shark week. In observance, we will watch Deep Blue Sea. It stars Thomas Jane and is about super-smart sharks. How bad can it be? Oh, about this bad.

This is available on Netflix.

“These all sound awful!” I hear you cry. Yes. Yes, they do. “These must be mocked mercilessly”, you say. Well, then you’re in the right company. The instructions for playing along:

  1. Start following @MockTM on Twitter.
  2. Start watching the movie on the appropriate Wednesday at 9 p.m. EDT.
  3. Once you’ve got the movie going, tweet your snarky comments to @MockTM.  Directing our tweets to @MockTM will keep our followers from being overwhelmed with our snark!
  4. Set up a search for @MockTM on Twitter for the duration so you can follow along with everyone else sharing your pain.

If you have suggestions for other movies that can and should be mocked, send them to @MockTM. Preference will be given to movies that are free or stream on the major media delivery services. Watch the feed, and we’ll set up the calendar for more terrible, mockable movies.

If you’ve missed a mocking, you can catch transcripts and even subtitle files for later watching on the Mock the Movie archive.

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Mock the Movie: Pommeled Edition

About the author

Stephanie Zvan is one of the hosts for the Minnesota Atheists' radio show and podcast, Atheists Talk. She serves on the board of Secular Woman. She speaks on science and skepticism in a number of venues, including science fiction and fantasy conventions. Stephanie has been called a science blogger and a sex blogger, but if it means she has to choose just one thing to be or blog about, she's decided she's never going to grow up. In addition to science and sex and the science of sex, you'll find quite a bit of politics here, some economics, a regular short fiction feature, and the occasional bit of concentrated weird. Oh, and arguments. She sometimes indulges in those as well. But I'm sure everything will be just fine. Nothing to worry about. Nothing at all.
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3 thoughts on “Mock the Movie: Pommeled Edition”

  2. great1american1satan
    2

    Long ago, I saw Deep Blue Sea in theaters, and I don’t want to spoil you on how awesome their use of Samuel Jackson was (hilarious!), but I will tell you the movie ends with an LL Cool J rap, the chorus of which is emblazoned on my mind for all eternity, thus:

    “Deepest, Bluest, My head is like a shark’s fin!”

    Sharknado can blow.

  3. carlie
    3

    Oh my goodness, I’ve actually seen that scene where he fights off an entire village horde with the help of a pommel horse conveniently placed in the town square. I believe it was part of another mocking, probably on Cracked.

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