Suing Italy and Israel on Behalf of Jesus.


Dola Indidis.

Dola Indidis.

A Kenyan lawyer, Dola Indidis has decided to sue some very long dead people, along with Israel and Italy, for the unlawful trial and execution of Jesus. Why? Well, someone has to uphold the dignity of Jesus. (Jesus can’t do that, because he’s stuck in an oak tree right now.)

A Kenyan lawyer has filed a petition with the International Court of Justice in The Hague, suggesting that the trial and crucifixion of Jesus Christ was unlawful. … The former spokesman of the Kenyan Judiciary is reportedly attempting to sue Tiberius (emperor of Rome, 42 BCE-37 CE), Pontius Pilate, a selection of Jewish elders, King Herod, the Republic of Italy and the State of Israel.

“Evidence today is on record in the Bible, and you cannot discredit the Bible,” Indidis told the Kenyan Citizen News.

Oh, sure you can discredit the bible. It’s one of the easiest messes to discredit. Barely takes any time or work at all. It’s a bit bothersome that an attorney doesn’t realize that the bible is a mashed up mess of stories, heavily edited over the years, with many different versions, which often contradict one another, and that does not constitute evidence. I would seriously hope that attorneys have a grasp on the concept of evidence.

Although those he suggests should have been convicted during the original trial have not been alive for more than 2,000 years, Indidis insists that the government for whom they acted can and should still be held responsible.

“I filed the case because it’s my duty to uphold the dignity of Jesus and I have gone to the ICJ to seek justice for the man from Nazareth,” Indidis told the Nairobian.

“His selective and malicious prosecution violated his human rights through judicial misconduct, abuse of office bias and prejudice.”

Dude, Jesus is supposed to be a god, so I’d think he can handle his own dignity issues. Also, the whole crucifixion nonsense was set up by Jehovah in the first place – that’s why he got busy with little Mary in the first fuckin’ place. Jehovah isn’t much good at planning, that much shows up clearly in the bible – he’s basically good at genocide, rape, and various gruesome punishments, so the whole “I’ll have kid and kill him” plan, yep, that’s Jehovah all over.

He is challenging the mode of questioning used during Jesus’s trial, prosecution, hearing and sentencing; the form of punishment meted out to him while undergoing judicial proceedings and the substance of the information used to convict him.

The substance of information? I’m pretty sure you don’t know what that means at all, Mr. Indidis, given that you think the bible is evidentiary in nature. I’m also curious as to who is footing the bill for all this nonsense.

Full story here.

Comments

  1. says

    He is challenging the mode of questioning used during Jesus’s trial, prosecution, hearing and sentencing; the form of punishment meted out to him while undergoing judicial proceedings and the substance of the information used to convict him.

    I’m looking forward to seeing the original records…
    But it’s not at all reassuring that not all completely stupid politicians are located in the USA

  2. Ogvorbis: A bear of very little brains. says

    “I filed the case because it’s my duty to uphold the dignity of Jesus and I have gone to the ICJ to seek justice for the man from Nazareth,” Indidis told the Nairobian.

    Hell, he’s going to have a tough time just coming up with evidence that the town of Nazareth even existed before the late first century CE.

  3. Kengi says

    I plan on suing the being known as AL 288-1, aka “Lucy”, for coming down out of the trees and evolving into evangelical idiots, and the government of Kenya for allowing that to happen.

  4. says

    Kengi:

    I plan on suing the being known as AL 288-1, aka “Lucy”, for coming down out of the trees and evolving into evangelical idiots, and the government of Kenya for allowing that to happen.

    I’d pay to see that lawsuit go forward!

  5. Czech American says

    “Indidis insists that the government for whom they acted can and should still be held responsible.”

    The governments of the Italian Republic and Israel are both less than a century old.

  6. chuckmc29 says

    This clown has been reading too much Cernovich (Pizzagate), AKA “trump news.” How many sociopathic/delusional attorneys are out there?

  7. Ogvorbis: A bear of very little brains. says

    chuckmc29 @6:

    How many sociopathic/delusional attorneys are out there?

    I really do not want an answer to that question. Why? Because I am sure that the answer would be depressing, scary, demoralizing and depressing.

  8. lumipuna says

    “I plan on suing the being known as AL 288-1, aka “Lucy”, for coming down out of the trees”

    Pro bonobo, I expect.

  9. blf says

    The mildly deranged penguin suggests suing the trees for producing the wood Mr Mythical Carpenterson was nailed to, and, for that matter, suing the Universe for containing the iron used in the nails. And also for everything about peas and horses, thought their critical role in the faerie story was edited out.

  10. Kengi says

    Also, isn’t that whole suffered-died-got better-schtick the whole point about Jesus? It’s a necessary part of the story so those people fulfilled god’s wishes.

    That doesn’t stop most fundies from blaming the people they hate. Jews and Catholics, in this case.

  11. says

    Catholics?
    There’s some chance this dude is catholic, but I know, I shouldn’t ask, but, how is it possible to blame catholics for the killing of the guy who became their founding father when they finally emerged as the dominant sect long after the events we’re talking about?

  12. Kengi says

    I think Dola is a Seventh-day Adventist. He’s asking for money to support his legal efforts through Friends of Jesus Nairobi, which is an SDA organization.

    Many Christian fundamentalists don’t consider Catholics to be Christian at all, and blame the Papacy for, well, anything and everything. And yes, in this case, I would imagine the connection with the Holy Roman Empire could play a part despite it not having existed at the time of Jesus since Dola’s grasp of history is, obviously, tenuous. I’m not sure we should be searching for any kind of logical consistency in his arguments.

    The logic may be as simple as “Rome was responsible as well. Hey! I can sue the Catholics in Rome as well!” It makes as much sense as suing Kenya for not keeping closer tabs on Lucy.

  13. khms says

    Here’s another thing this clown doesn’t seem to have a grasp on: retroactive laws, or rather that they aren’t supposed to be, and most aren’t. The legal code this would have to be considered under is what was around back in the day. Many modern ideas about the law were non-existent, and I suspect (IANAL) that being able to sue the government for what a previous government did is one of them. Certainly, neither government had accepted the authority of the not-yet-existing ICJ!

    Also, I seem to recall that the “official” chronologies in the bible don’t match up, that some officials that seem (from the bible) to have been A after B, have from actual records been B after A, and stuff like that. (And painting PP as the (almost) good guy is in sharp contrast with what we know about him from other sources, such as being recalled for having a nasty habit of crucifying any Jew who looked at him sideways.)

  14. lumipuna says

    “(And painting PP as the (almost) good guy is in sharp contrast with what we know about him from other sources, such as being recalled for having a nasty habit of crucifying any Jew who looked at him sideways.)”

    That makes an interesting historical context for the origin of Christianity. I always had this understanding that earliest Christianity was ethnically Jewish and probably viciously anti-Roman. Same would go for messianic Jewish preachers, such as Jesus might have been. Later, there were actual large scale Jewish rebellions. Sounds like perfect mutual conflict escalation between foreign tyranny and ethno-religious zealotry.

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